Newspapers / The Waynesville Mountaineer (Waynesville, … / June 3, 1954, edition 1 / Page 7
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THE WAYNESVILLE MOUNTAINER To A Whisker DIENTO, Calif (API ? ?rn pacific Kailroad uses w to determine safe *(?r loaded freight cars , ? and on bridges of its tvada line. ,ul Car is equipped with [.tipped aluminum feelers l from the lop and sides. They operate something like the whiskers of eats walking in the dark. When the feelers touch an ob struction, they transmit the dis tance to dials inside the car, where crewmen record them. Zoologists estimate there are around 900.000 species of animals of which 675,000 are insects. A FIRE IN THIS ROOM early Tuesday morning resulted in the death of Henry Paul Webb, 31, at the residence, 404 Richland St., j ' ? . 11 Hazelwood. The blaze was believed ignited by a cigarette. (Mountaineer Photo). The Cow Paster Sirkit By UN RLE ABE "?Went Into Graveyard" I remember when I went on the j Cow Paster ,Sirkit 1 had egzackly 6 diseases?all I listed herebefoar plus Eckzemy. Also I remember what the Steward over at the Val- I ley Church, Uncle Tom Hawkins, j reported to his church a'ter that he had come to meet me. j "Well, folks," he told 'em, Ii don't no what kind o' preeeher j ! we've got, howsumever, I kin tell \ I ye one thing, the conf'rence shore I went into the graveyard, almost, to git him." My menyou (under Dc. Abel) was as toilers: 1 soft biled aig, 1 glass o' biled sweet milk. 1 peece o' toast ?that was for breckfas. For din ner. the same?an' for summer also thar was "no change in the South ward." That was my menyou fof a month or two. Then I made the mistake o' eatin' haff a peech? when I had a vilent onset. The j folkes whir I was stayin' that nite j I tliawt I was goin' to die. "I'm j a-goin' at'er the doeter," sed the man of the house. "No, hold it," sez I; "my docter so7 I'm not hardly as sick as I 'pear to be endurin' theze spells. Jist give me this here stimylant. boys, punch up the far?an' keep the water a'bilin", (yes, hit was iist like a hawg-killin' time). Then I sed to the gals: Walk me over the floar one more time?an' massarg me up an' down." (Gals make the best mas sargers, ye no.) Well, as ye can see from this e-pissel. 1 did git over that spell >an' others as well); an' I soon1 commenct to improv in my helth ?also in my cattle-tradin'. But I won't say 'bout my preechin'. Wanted oraveyara sermons Trubble was, at some places they . wanted me to preech graveyard ser ! mons. an' I don't z'leeve much in i them. I all'as perferred makin' fokes laff?never did like to see fokes cry, 'speshly grown-ups. , V/hile I don't b'leeve in takin' the Gospil too all-fard lite an' makin' a joke of it, I sertinly don't b'leeve In makin' a funeril ackazeyun of it all the time?an' I told 'em so. In this way I got by with jist as few graveyard (crylnB an' shoutin') scrvises as possibul. Well, in a year or so I had made 'nough at precchln' an' tradin' to buy me a k-yar. But bit was shore hard to keep up a k-yar on the Cow Paster Sirkit. Thar wuz-nt cnny ragu'ashuns or restrickshuns, skeorcely, in them daya on k-yars ?jist so a feller could mannige to oan some kind o' trap, buy the gas an' keep it on the road 'thout ! gittin' killed. . f Used The Fam'ljr To Brake l'de have the fam'ly git out whenever I'd git stalled in a muddy place: then a'ter chuggin' throo, I d lode up aig-in an' go helter skelter onct more. Purty soon I had no brakes: so when the down hill was too steep l'de have wife an' childcrn tall above 2 years old) to hold back while I hell the k-yar In low. That shows how steep some o' the roads air on Cow Paster. ( raelft 3?k Ribs But onct the Sirkit Rider neerly got kilt on a steep grade. I thawt secon' gear an' the foot-brake ?whal lhar wrt?> would hold But 1'de forgot 'bout the 200 To. man 'r.ame was Ike> that I'de pickt up on the way. So blamed if that ol' Shivvy didn't git faster an faster down thaf ml. side? "Hold it. Ike!" 1 shouted?"the 'mergency brakj;." "I'm a-hnldin' all I kin," he sed. Well I saw hit was eether to run lido a bank?an' slow that thing down, or fd run off the road 'round them sharp curves; so I let the k-yar plow sorter catty whomper son into the upper bank. Hit didn't turn over; but the force bashed my led side in 'ginst the edge o' that ol' runny-about doar. 1 was lade up for a month?3!.a crackl ribs the docter sed?ycs-siree! Sines O' Trubble Well, we got along purty well up ontil the 4th year?that was as long as enny-one had ever heLl out on the Cow Paster. The fust sines o' trubble I had was When one o' the Steward commenct chompin' his teeth at me. sorter like a mad boar. I axt somebody what the man reely ment b yi{. I was told that I must look out? "He's gittin' reddy to charge, caze he wanted a change in pree chers this year." That man hap pened to be the very feller what had been furnishin' me honey here to fore. Well, I told some o' my loyal members that I didn't mind the man's chompin' at me so much as 1 did doin' 'thout honey. Funeral Is Held For Mark In the third year I b'lieve it wuz. we lost our milk row. named Mack?seein' as how we got her as a caff from Mack White here in Waynesville. I know my frend White never had a better name sake, animal or hewinan. As one tow trader here in Haywood use to say, "She is (wuz) all milk an' butter"?yes, sir-ee! Howsumever. she up an' got run ever by a truck on the highway? while she was pickin' 'long the edge. (You see now don't you, what hard pickins it wuz on the Cow Paster for both man an' beast?) We had a plenty of both the pathetick an' funny to happen here, but this was about as pa thetick as any. Mrs. Abe an' the childern had the funeril nex' day a'ter the cow dide an' while I wuz gone. A few of the naybor chil dern had been invited in to help sing?for fear the fam'ly might git so full they couldn't sing. A'ter Mrs. Abe had sed a few words (the childern scd they were vefy proper an' comfortin' words) an' a song j had been sung the flowers wuz placed on the grave?by little hands that really loved that pet milk cow. I think the funeril song wuz, "In The Sweet Bye an' Bye." We all regretted the loss oi 300 Collegians To Open Training Course At Lake i More than auo rvietnoaisi coiiege students and adult counselors from 12 Southern states will open an eight-day leadership training con ference here Tuesday (June 8.) The student conference will be the first South-wide meeting of the season at the Lake Junaluska As j sembly. which is marking its 41st i year as the Methodist Church's j summer program headquarters in the Southeast. I The Rev. Sam L. "Laird, director of religious life al Emory Univer ! sity, Atlanta, Ga., will direct the ! student meeting, representing the Methodist Board of Education Headquarters in Nashville. Tenn The Rev. R. Harold Hipps, Greensboro, N. C., will serve as dean and an eminent French theo logian, Dr. Emile Caillict of Princeton University, will be the 1 daily platform speaker. Dr. Cai 11 let vvill relate his ad Mack. Also Uncle Abe regretted the fact that word got out that Mis. Abe could hold a better fun eril service than I could. - | Took The Swell-Head Unkle Abe wuz ginerally boin' called "preecher" by now?an' wuz j fdelin' sorter big. In fackt when I'de got over two or three of my diseezes an' wuz eatin' 'bout Its what a preecher is s'pozed to eat, and I'de got well stretched out on the Cow Paster in the spring of 1P25. I felt 'bout as big as a Pre sidin' Elder. I felt fully as big if my ol' Shiwy wuz a-workin' well ) and my gas tank wuz 1-3 full an' j ?most important, if I got two or three kompliments on my "won derful sermont." Now, S or 6 kompliments is the limit with most preechers. Caze if thar's more than that the head I ginerally begifis to swell?an' mout bust, yes sir-ee! So. that bein' the |cese it mout be best for a preecher to have one or two in his congre |gashuns chompin' their teeth at him?sorter acks as a re-dooccr, ! sec? (To be concluded next week) No Fish In Jail DANVILLE, Va. (API?Sgt. A. W. Wiggs of Danville police called on a friend and to open the con versation in a jocular mood asked him if there was anybody there he v anted sent to jail. "1 don't believe so." the friend replied. "Go on . . . Go ahead," shouted his wife from an inner room. The puzzled pair found that the wife thought her husband was be ing invited to go fishing. dresses to the conference theme, "The Campus Predicament and the 1 Christian Corrective." Workshops in worship, the Bible, recreation, music, public relations, campus evangelism, mis- j sions, social action and Christian education will be led by Wesley Foundation directors on college, campuses and staff members of national Methodist boards. The Lake Junaluska conference t is one of six regional training pro grams for students being sponsor ed this year by, the church educa tion board and the Methodist Stu dent Movement. Two others this month will be at j Epworth ForesL Ind., June 12-19, j and Camp Casowasco, N. Y., June 9-16. Three to open August 28 will be at Mt. Sequoyah, Ark., Lake Poinsett, S. D., and Lake Tahoc, Calif. Seyond Belief DETROIT <AP>?The first time lie man came into court charged dth stealing canned goods from a ospital where he worked, he ex laincd: "I found out someone else had tolen the stuff and I was just re urning it." Recorder's Judge Joseph Gillis ocked a quizzical eye, but found lim innocent. Two weeks later the man was back before the Judge, with this explanation of 14 one-pound bags of coffee found by a hospital guard who noticed a suspicious bulge under the defendant's coat: "I knew someone else was plan ning to steal this coffee, so I just decided to take it first." The man got 90 days in jail. ? H. G. Wells wrote more than a dozen books after he was 70 years old. | [WISE - BUY WISE ECONOMIZE POP AND SAVE AT THE MOKY MOUNTAIN elf Service Grocery Take Advantage of This LOW, LOW PRICE ON 7:30 loffee 99c 2 Tall Cans imation Milk 25c SUGAR 49c Tennessee Sliced ACON 69c &n Choice MATOES 10c EEN BEANS 3 lbs 29c t Stalk ,ERY | Qc LUMBERS 3 lbs 25c PLE JELLY 2 lb Jar 29? te Yellow UASH lb Cc EF STEW lb 4Qc to Pure ARD 4 99c Bascue 'eanut Butter In Beautiful 12 oz. Flowered Glass ? ~ W f ? lfe 12 oz. Jar 'TANT COFFEE 49c EXTRA SPECIAL VALUE! Purchase 2 Medium Size Boxes of INSO 24c w WE are the best in OPENED seven quality of Days a week products and for your prices to fit shopping your grocery convenience budget. All TK(>wo V tfhiir Prirou A n#l -? ? "vov mw?? m. nvvo onw Many More At ? ftoky Mtn. Self ervice Grocery Owned and Operated By ELMER HENDR1X 5 J I E I) I L 1 V 1 R Y m Rd ' IXal GL 6-6565 I Wife Prfsei^e^ fcdfVl m Avoid excessive thread tension when you are lowing washable clothes. Too tight seams will pucker when wvt. Kx iwrtl advise using II to 14 stitches |>er Inch, depending upon the fabric. If seams are not too tightly stitched they will re main flat even after a number of launder*, intra. f l) Meet Us At The OPEN AIR CURB MARKET Just Across From The Courthouse FRESH VEGETABLES Our Prices Are Right! Plenty of ICE COLD MELONS New Management C. B. CURTIS 0 [ST Lung and Short Sleeve SPORT SHIRTS | Chpose one of these t"' c-o-o-1 sports shirts for ^ work or play. Patterns are as gay ... or as quiet as your taste may sug-f^B jjest. Newest, coolest 1 fabrics! Cool, Comfortable SLACKS ? Gabardines ? Flannels ? New Miracle Fabrics 1'riced To Fit Your Budget! ' \ This Is ? , STRAW HAT SEASON fpf - - - and we have a \ \ fine selection of hats for you to choose from ? ? COOL ? LIGHTWEIGHT ? DLKABLE Before You Buy, Try . . . Turner's Store Main Street Waynesviile THANKS TO THE PEOPLE OF HAYWOOD COUNTY FOR YOUR SUPPORT IN THE DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY LAST SATURDAY ? I Deeply Appreciate The Vote Which Was Given Me Saturday As A Candidate For Nomination To The Board of Commissioners frank r. medford
The Waynesville Mountaineer (Waynesville, N.C.)
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June 3, 1954, edition 1
7
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