M
V-v V-
THE
GASTON
: , J. :
A
GAZETTE
(Devoted to the Protection of Home and the Interests of tie County.
Gastoma, Gaston County, N. C, Satuhday Morning,' June 26th., 1880..
No. 19.
Vol. I.
r
Charlotte, Norlli Carolina,
rmctici' limited to tin-
Eye, Ear and Throat.
jJgy-OITice witli. Pre. Jonrs k Graham.
2ios.M. (Pitlman, ,
Attorney at-L'aw,
opposite Court House,)
Practice in the, Stole and Federal Courts
on,( pny ndiW attention tii bu.-inesn.
Will neiotitate loans.
' Charlotte. N. C, 1G JuneStf.
RO. D. GRAHAM,
A fCoriic'y-at-Law,
. In the Slate and United States Court.
Uncord Information, Abstract of Title,
Sunvij. &( , fnrnhlied for compensation.
Officii, N.-ft. cor. TraJo .mil J'ryon tits.,
CILAKLOTTK, X. C. marti-ly
7t ci
ney at
caw,
OALT.AH, . c.
Will prnrtire ill Huston tind adjoining
CiUi.nl ies and (lie State and Federal Cmirls.
JinsiurM promptly uttinded In. t'eb'2l:y
VASTUS J A Surf It Carolina,
lltHTIU.RR dK
Purs Coppsr Distills i Rsstified
kin 4
i ' a r -
Hew; f'.' Best MaLt in tin' Count i ij.
( Irdeis iil ltd I'll short I otic-.
fet.21 (im A It. Rll W K
Cotton-.j?ec
if!'? a ni-e, lid t,f Ht'lc'trd ulnlilll i;'"C7'i
ChHhi, Si,nl, v'urli I n-:i xetliuq at 0 ,
j)tr bu-ylli'L
Ciili tit Mil irx'ie (.' in m t (I'txiou.ti
ore:! iI.k fiftieth t-fftzt.
M.-JI .'i: ' M . X. ill A! IC.
Xo (ll.Jlll'ti. II lllieVi:l', f.l II' ti l' Iil f
rxc!f. a discount, id '.'') per- e't l.ir n. d. :u
'l V.ltH'H.
Npeeiitl ii itietfi in local roiuiiu.fi wi" '..c
uikwi''j ; iC p-T lino, '! yV in
vutico (. AV. A'iiaik, i'uVI.
FAY3S0UX BfiQTHERS,
(iistneii. ' X 0 ."" t n 'siroi i im ,
-lnr .f love. nv .(Oodfo.
Tin y have ji:-t n ccivi d :t i f ii II
!, ft, .-I ..rk o .
Uro ei !- (Vll'i" , Sreu'S. .( 'iii -
ili''", ('iij.'irs, Toli.ii'i'i'S, iVi!.
ililjliWt'iiiiiiki't priiu imiil for cotn.tr j
Produce.'' ' ftb-.'8il'
. -v. ' ..... ....... :
J". II. WARREN", "
BLACKSMITH,
Muitt Hirect, (jitKtonifi. N. C!..
Ilegs to cull the utteutuui of lii. friendi! to
,. call and. fitt tnir limsri neatly shod,
beside all kiudx of Htoch.mitliin;
aUcndtd to at extremely It w prices.
KXtJlXK FOR .SALK.
I Imve one 6 Horse Steam Poi'tabJi1 Kn
giitf ( the Kfiipw make, in ymd onien
ni' 'Flires'ilT and Separator, tmi' Cclto
(iiu Mini IVi'Hi for sale. Hie . lii'rr n f
S.'.!0(). I will .-!l l Im nhole l i l.-.till
warrunk'il in oil work it 14 order. Tin
KiSfine 11 ml Tiiriln r tnt ic nsi il by Mi
Sm re, tlirenhing wheat -in (Ja-'nu unin
ty hiHi sumiiiir. Call nt our i.ffiiv or
HililrcHS . T. I'-. HKAlin,
. - Y. ik vili.'. S. 0.
J. It. EDDIXS.
goofcjJrtlfr & itntioucr,
CllAl!MTl'K. N. C,
Keeps constantly on hand a full and
well selecii'd stock of everything in his
line.
h'pecial attention given to orders by
mail.
Orders from Country Merchants solicit
ed, apr 3
Ml N E Y&B E ALT"
Opposite Waddill IIouso, Gastonia, X. C
1 Dpalers, in
RnrpniFs
JIUuJjlllJjiJ
OF ALL KINDS.
Best Mo!bk , Colli rs and Sm-ars,
Chetse and Crackers" Candus and Nuts.
Flour and Meal, ISacon and I aril,
Cipars and Tobacc. Orourd Cuff rs. '
Spicts and Teas, . Fruits, kc, &., k:
COUNTRY PRODUCE.
Barter for Butter i Eggs.
Btd sure and give m a Call, us we arc
determined to not be undersold.
GUIDANCE.
B1 RKV. CIIARLK3 I.. TIIOMP-OS.'
' " "
Alonif the.ltoya a child's hnu Rlraycd,
And dcord Oiled tlio uir ; . ' ,
Even 8i my lilunderinit lumrt, I gid,
That geelti to voice i t-t pniyt-r.
1 have no art to shupo my siet'oli,
My though 19, uiHtuudy, fttruy
slinid the oountlMS cares tliat. reach
Vcoin dawn to iarkuuii; day.
'I'ho melody I faiu would lift,
Breaks up in fihglt d ciiurdn, '
Through which the voicele-is longings drift,
Tint c.wiiiot ridu to words.
II.
The mother's hands tlm child's surround,
ICii'wl;dsti and love combine,
Tn i'. unskilled finders miy give sound
To i houiitd or hopes divine.
And tliosu who. hear thu notes rxpand
' Aloujj the evening's calm,
Cannot divide the baby's hand
Prom m ithur'd circling palm.
Oh! Live iJivine, tint readiest down
To choose the keys for me,
Amid each wild, discordant tone
. Discerning nulo.ly,
Lay Tiioa the hand of grace along
My heart,, mid aolily wreathe
Amid my fiiilures the sweet sung
Of hope I cannot breathe
Wnen round nit! evening' shadows flow,
And the Icksom is all done,
t)nly my heart aini (J.jiI will know
1 1 i M bund urn) mine wire one.
OnE.DaY IX A SKTTI.EK'd LlFE.
"If vondi-'td a jruiii il r il love foi
jnn.i'vir v.o'ni.1 Lavt liiui'i) ni-'uut iir
t!iin d'.hoi.iti' wt'.f'eriifH'",'' wiid Mrn Ito
'and l?i.r'.i
!') .
.i'lC -i I S'
io.l ; 1! i -'.'
:i'jnit."t !.lll'
It'll! f
, i .-I ii v
i'r .-!.'i; u
c Mil-
not
:ci'
pllhl' tl.Ul
1 1 t i i u' !i ;
ten' li i.kii'
in t hi so
iaifiii'ii 'tt'i'-
tn a 'in
Miii'oq'ue j
it era
i.eisi-if ir.
yini in i'ii
M'ul.l l.a
f.- iVoWiirk, ''II
it imii.i . y.iu liitver
!li
'.i'.
nt id ii-i:iit it.
W'.i.n wives sti ii)(o ii passion t'aey an
a jit to .say t'liiti!.:.-..t!i:'.!-tiny' may liertafter
bitfrl
y Ti!;ret.
Mrs. ll iriiy
h.ii?laiid s'ni'd
as no ex
e.-.'.
ion. Her
l.rri.liil' .-ly
siiint, his fiie
nil
nut lie ui
lU'iiTii-d a 71-iir vet.
.".latte, ' be urswen-il el. last, in tonis
haul and cold, "if I had not thomrht you
were willing, ay, aud more than willing to
risk it I should never have brought you,
and you know it. Remember, I told you
it would bo a rough lite; yet you were
eager to come." "
Juno Hardy remembered very well. But
the iiiuimry (if her ardent protestations,
her generous furgt tfulncss of self, only a g
ereil her the more just Dow. -
"How was I to know it was to be like
this I There I You can go if you are go
ing. I should like to be alone with all
this win k to do,"
' I am going directly," wa9 Mr. Hardy's
an-wer, 'striving for tranquillity. "Will
Jim lv.- oinl inongh to put up my lunche
on ? J 1-hail not cmnc bmk until night."
"O di-ar, yos,"' she replied with alucrity,
liiinuiiig her face awny from the window
wiih ujeik; and proceeding' to make a
great clutter in the cupboard, which in
this pioneer cabin was a CJinbination of
pantry 11111J china closit.
''1 lear there is but a short allowance of
wood j will it last until evening?" said
Mr. Ilnidv, dubiously looking at the wood
box iie'bai) ju t replenished.' and turning
to brush up the bits of bark that had fall
en on tbe neat rag-capet. His words were
kind, but bis tone was as chilly as au icicle.
' There is plenty ; do not trouble your
self," responded his wife resentfully, her
eyes brut 011 the bread she was battel ing.
In five minute, man, dinner pail, axe,
and dog had vanished in the direction of
the great forest ; and the young wife wax
alone, as she hud vehemently desired to
be. Roland Hardy bad gone forth to h i
dny's work of felling timber.
Most young audanury wives would bave
burst into tears at this point. Jane. liar
dy did not. She leaned against the rude
mantel-shelf when her huobaiid's footsteps
njjotitter -ounded in tin' cii"p snow; and,'
Took'd unatlerralilv sud and hopeless, us
if the liiht of her lile bad suddenly gone j
out ; hjjjjcd r m irm fnl. too as il c -nM ii.tis
of haviinf hud siiii.eifitoi; to do wiTh its an
iiihitiition. j
Tl.e story is 'me of those cfttn enoiith
eitiieted ih'ilip New Wor'd. . CYr'aii ix !
pi ('tilth ns suddenly luiliit; 1 im, RuKnid
Hardy manfully n solved to betake himself
to the m'gbty woihIs, clear out settle- I
ment for himself, eiect bis own house, It 1
binsou Crusoe fashion; and in time, by dint
of his bauds' bard labor, become prosper"
ous. Hardy, the settler, he would be then,
with his farm lands around him. his flocks
and herds, his people and his comforts. But
all that would have to be patiently worked
on for, and the beginning must, of necessity,
be weary and toilsome. - Jane Deane, to
whom he was ejigaged, decided to go oat
with him his wife. lie told her be bad
better go on first, say for a year or two ;
her friendttf"d. 1 b,wr """ r '"'
tbe youni
as he wa'
riage, de
lonely life would be, 3 aiw t.Mws4
at it-wtrh- rose-eolored spectacles, and
thought it would be charming, a kiod of
perpetual picnic. It was true she did not
bargain for the help they had taken with
them, lo tbe shape of a man end woman
servant, deserting them speedily, tired
wjth the new rough work, sick at the lone
liness rtnd T.hose engaged in their places
(after endless trouble and long negociation)
had not yet come. But she had put ber
shoulder bravely to the wheel in the sum
mer weather, and made light of hardships.
It was winter now, and for the first time
her temper bad given Way.
Everything Bcenied to have cone wrong
in the cabm that, morning; and her husb
and's calm cheerfulness through it nil had
provoked her most unwarrantably. But
she was not feeling well.
It is possible that many of us'have such
uiortiiniia murninus when everything ani
animate, and inanimate, conspires to brintf
to the surLee the original gorilla that
slumbers wiibin the soul. These vexations
imve to in' henieii down pri inptly 111 der
uni 's-fif t. and .Mis. Hardy had stooped to
i-cpiitriiiir with hi rs. A dear liti'c rose had
tu tu dic vt red fn a 'n". Tlnmifh wrapped ill
Il 1 nel and place in the warmest comer of
bui row u 1.1'er Hie fi.ior, called, as a
maMi-r l dignity, tiie cellar. To be sure,
t tic potatoes had bran ki'idiy spared : but
wi ijt "i-r-cross p i'at is'when lovely La-
nirqtiH hud liroopicl in death 1 Mourning
!'i-i r tin in. Mr". Ha dy forgot tiie milk
t!vi5:,hnd ilie milk tniiM indiirnantlv tiolled
over. Ou'ehing the pan from the stove,
I.. 1 .1 "plush of -hot m k fell on the front
breadth of her clean crisp French srirgham,
and another on the esr of poor David,
stretched on the hearth; and the dog howl
ed respoasive'y. At another time 'Jane j
wmiM have' lauVhed ; but laughing was
very lar :rt m ber mood this morning ; life
in .general was lookinsr deprissedly
siloomy ; and wbpn Mr. J lardy came into
this atmosphere of hurnt milk and piteous
lion-wliitifntfs, she was declaring, in her
fervid way, that house keeping out West
was just simply villainous, and that she.
hated it here she caught his provoking'y
smiling eyes yes; hated it, and him; and
the place, ard everything.
He met tne words jokingly, and it in
censed her. In her anery spirit she said
unforgivable things, and Mr. Hardy was
provoked into retorting. So they jarrpd
and jangled through breakfast. That k.ihe
did.
For some little time Roland Hardy had
feared that a sort of suppressed discontent
was takinsr possession of his wife She
was quieter at times almost sad, and less
given to laughter than in their old bright
days, as he had got to calling them. He
had hoped everything of ber love and de
votion hoped that he might ever remain
as near aad dear, ss much "all the world'
to her as she had ofter declared him to he.
And now this bad come of it j this dread
ful quarrel. She had spoken out ber mind.
His heart was aching w tb ber reproach
es j but, generous ever, he excused her to
himself as he walked along to tbe woods.
It was asking too muck of mortal woman,
he argued, anxious to make himself wretch
ed, to tear her far away from home and
friends, and all the comfortable delights of
well-regulated New Eugland life, and tc
expect Iter to be always glad, and buoyant,
and brave, and hopeful, keeping his own
soul up with tbe wine-like tonic of her
blithe spirits. No. It was tbe same old
beginning of tbe end, a mere question of
time. Eventually she would become the in.
different, matter-f fact sort of womnn that
most wives appeared to be; regarding him
the lover as a, kind of mild, inevitable
evil, necessary to her support, and respecta-'
hie to have about the home. Sxmcr nr
Intel, he supposed, all husbands and wives
awoke from their dream of love, to the
lnnc, dreary reality of making the best of
things Nfverth-Uss. her fierce outburst
mi (big particular morniiii; took bim by
sii' prisf, somewhat aroused bis indignation.
.,d it not been ber free choice to enter en
this "villainous' hou.'kcf ping T Had he
not warned her freely and fully that her
days, if she came: With bim, would be any
thing but a bed of rosea f Was Dot life
harder for him, inexpressibly barjer, than
4i
ft
it bad eyer been, a totally different - thing
altogether; but be bore on perseveringly
and untiiinly, looking to the ei d in view,
and making matters light for her sake.
Suppove Ruppore a flush dyed the
young roan's pttient face'aB the thought
occurred to him suppose she refused to
stay here, and went home to her friends.
Meanwhile, Mrs. Hardy stood on tyy the
nr.antlepieca, horribly miserable more
miserable tban she had ever dreamed of be
. wr mra.'Jane
Hardy, her passion over, was chewing the
husks of bitter repentance. He did not
love her any more ; he could not, or he nev
er would have said harsh things to -her ;
and this was the end of it all
'To call me Jane,' 1" she exclaimed a-
loud, as if the word ' June" contained all
forms of vituperation. "Nobody has been
cruel enough to call me that in all my life!"
turning to the breakfast tabic with a
bravely-conquered sob. For this young
lady, who bad been a pet at home, bad
never been called fcy her husband, or any
body else, by a harder name than Jenny.
Work is so good a thing 1 Auerbach
says it should have been the first command
ment :""Tbou shalt work 1" Jenny was too
unfamiliar with heart-torture to be conscious
of bow good her work was.- but she could
not but be uware, as the raoring passed as
way, that something wasdriving tbe clouds
out of her skyc Rolaud could not desp se
herallat onca.sbewHS sua She wouldaath
er up the remnant rf his love.und guard and
no. rish it sotenderly that, like her poor
Lam irque rott, it .must s;ill lift itself to
the sun upain, and sometime blossom into
a little beautycf sweetnt'83, and so make
life endurable, jShu would, in so inatiy
nuble and heroic ways, prove to him but
no ; how could she do that ? there whs
nothing noble or heroic to do. Wo.
men's li ves ordinary wi rnn's' lives, like
hers bad no heroic cliimceS. SIih could
only keep his bouse in (icw order, cook his
favorite dishes, waieh over bis shirt but
tens, forget tils' oft days ol ease when site
was a listless young lady, and iwver, never,
never Iosp her temper at'sio. It was nil
dreadfully coiniTi'iiiplace, and of no account;
but she bad embraced this lot ol ber own
free willj and out of her deep love for bim,
and it was the only way by which she
could hope to climb to the heights of his
regard again. As for his old romantic love
for her, his tender, chivalrous devotion, that
could never corns' back ; she wasn't worth
it. And so, accep ing, tire dust of humila
tion, and, like a genuine women, having no
mercy on herself, she went through the
household duties, thinking all the time bow
Hear to her weie liusbnd and heme, and
how she would strive to muke herself endiir
rabl", please God, to them.
It was a decidedly pleasant loir cabin
Log cabins are always pleasant when an apt
house-keeper piesides over them, end
enough of the world's lucre can be affird
ed to cover the walls with ta-tclul paper,
and the floor with comfortable cat pets.
Those rude logs of which we read, with
their thatched roofs, clay floors, and chim.
neys built of sticks, are far more endurable
on canvas and in the rhymes of young po
ets, than in actual life, where they mean
simply rheumatism, and insects This
house was diff rentx;it was a spt'ciisus.cnm
fortable, well-furnished place ; and pnty
called a log cabin ofter the custom of tie
country.
A s'aunch roof ; substantial walls, orna
mental within ; CiirpJs, books, pictures, a
rare cl"ck, easy chairs : everything for
cwmfort mcf I he eye. The sleei ing rooms
above gave evidence of ingenious and taste'
ful powers brought to bear upon their
building and furnishing. Charming expe
dients, graceful rustic ornamentations. pret
ty and useful things that cost little, made
the cabin seem very much of a cosy man
sion In a sum 1 1 way. In the midst of an
almost savage wilderness, R il.ind Hardy j
bad erected his duelling with a view rath
er to fularc.ex;g"iicies than pr sent ueeds ;
and he and his wife both possessed tbe gift I
of "making the most of things." j
And it is surprising how deft'y in these
remote homes a woman, though she may
have been gently born and reared, soens
learns ts accomplish the needful daily work.
Where tier's a will there's a way and
Jane Il.irdy had It arm d to take a pirasuie
and a pride h it.
By noon to day the work was done, and
jhe house was in the trimmest order. White
loaves, just from tl.e ovvn, were d-ffiiuing
their fres'l yeasty Irrigrauiv-; the wttk's
ironing huuif warm ami a p"l'e9 across the
ch'tlus.: erse. On li e tut, ie inn kod au
exceedingly lomnia ' CU! 01 lea ; and ovt-r
it leaned the pensive young bousi keepi r,
pretending to do justice to her solitary
luocbeoc.
Her thoughts were away in the suowy
woodland with bim, her husband ; who was
doubtless, about this time, eating prairie
chicken and clammy bread-and butter.
"He might build a fire, and give it a little
roast 00 a stick," she pensively murmured;
auu then she fell bow very glad she should
be when night should come, aud she conld,
in many furtive way, confess to bim how
vety sorry she was, how deeply in need of
bis dear love.
4" Jt was nearly three o'clock when, me
inically looking through the window in
direction ol the forest she wassfirprls
Jto see the dog, 1 avid, making for tbe
house, in a wavering, uncertain way. as if
be had half a aiod to turn back to tbe
woods. David bad more tban once wearied
of the monotony of wood-chopping, and
come to the bouse an hour or two in ad
vance ol his msster; so titers was nothing
startling in his coming now. He scratched
at the dcor iu his usual obsequious fashion;
dartt-d to devour, when admitted, a morsel
of bread and meat , but, quitting it instan
taneous y, went and sat down before his
mistress, with the air of having something
to say, and begn to. whine.
(To be Continued)
A Pike County Ghost.
The lastest sensation in the neighbor
hood of Milford, Pike County, Pvnnyl
vania. Fitty-two years ago a man nam.d
John G ible was found lying in a pool of
blood on the road leading from Milford to
Dinnman's Ferry. A large gush was
found in. the side of bis bead, and it was
supposed t bat the old man had been mur
dered and rolbed. nj was buried imme
diately after the Coroner's inquest, and
in a few years entirely forgotten. About
three weeks ago the 6tage .driver who
carries "the '.-Philadelphia mail between
Milford and the D.deware Water (Jap.
while passing the spot where Uoblewas
murdered, saw an object elothed in white
start up from the ground and - walk in the
road just in front of the horses. The drU
ver urged bis team on, but the "ghost still
kept a little in advance, After trotting
his hti ses some distance, Hie driver stopped,
and as ho dismounted ftom the stage tbe
ii host sank into the ground. and disappeared.
This was repeated two or three evenings,
and the mail-carrier at last became alarmed
and armed himself with a six-shooter. Since
that time be has seen the ghost at a dis
tauco several tira-'s, but he has not shot at
it. The mail' carrier's ramo is Seales, and
he told his story in Mi'ford, where it spread
like wildfire. Parties were organized to
search for the wandering spirit, and one
party saw it at a short distance. They
fired several sbotj at the object, and it dis
appeared. A party of young ladies, accom
panied by one getitleman, a day or . two
ugo visited the place where the ghost is
usually seen. About a hundred yards
from tbe spot is an old deserted house, and
one of the)onng ladies, who was more ceura
geous than the rest, started to walk around
this old house' in search of the "spook."
When about half way arouud tbe build
ing she beard a groan; and tur'iiing aronnd,
she saw, staudiiig just behind her, an object
about six feet tall, clothed, in white, She
screamed and fainted, but before the re
mainder of the party reached Mr the'ghost'
had vanished. The "spirit" lias since been
. j
seen twice, and on each occasion it was
pursued, bat it always vanished after
reaching a certain place iD the woods. It
i supposed by many that the ghost is a
man. dresst-d up in a sheet to create a
sensation. Others, who are mure suoer
stitious, believes it is the spirit of John
Goble, searching for hi murderer. .What
ever it is, it certainly succeeded in crea'ti: g
a decided sensation. .
Perils of Housekeeping:.
Hjve you paid the milk bill.,
The coal is out. K.
The stove wanta fixing.
Mv niuht-key is broken.
That from door bell wire
is loose and
the bell won't ring.
Get some fresh meat. That cat hasn't
fijid anything fresh for nearly two days,
She won't eat cooked meat.
Tne poker is broken.
Get some screw hooks for the cupboard.
We must boy a new clothes line.
Tbe salt is ont.
Mem.: .Mark's last butter was bad
Must toy s mewhere else.
The itvuiaii has ,ri," aud he leaves
dread fully small pieces at tbaj.
(let some wire.
DiltO PXaliC acid.
-I'.Uo bug powder.
Ditto a nutmeg grater.
Ditto some nutmeg.
Shall e buya new psrlor carpel? The
old out ' getting faded.
Wii't a new tin slewpaD.
The teapot leaks.
Send for funiture man and find out bow
much he asks for( re-covering the sofa.
Bay a new market basket.
The old cat haa four kittens. How
many shall we drown?
We suspect our hired girl of stealing tb
tea. That last half pound went very quick.
Schnapps, the grocer, will persist lo giv
ing us coffee which has lost its flavor.
Change him.
Somebody hasstoleo tbe ash-box again.
Fifth in three weeks.
Get a paper of carpet tacks. fj
" Mrs. Doe "borrowed "bar tack bammer
a mouth ago, and has never returned it.
Our canary bird is sick.
Buy a ball of twine.
Ditto six small screws.
Ditto a hatchet.
The iceman forgot us to day.
The coal meat and milk is spoiled.
Tbe cat persists in carrying ber kittens
all over ihethouse. and won't stay in the
nursery soap box we fixed for her.
Get some uaptha.
Toe wa'er. pipe leaks agin. S?ad
plumber.
Out of so;p.
Out of matches. " ;
She wants some worsted three shades
d.rker than the last lot but one, aud one
ehade lighter than the last lot.
Pnt.iTEK ess in GKKAiMriN. Politeness
is alvvuvs tbe mark of good breeding, and
some of the greatest nieu have been noted
for their courtesy Many years sko, the
errand boy imp loved ry a publishing bouse
was sent to procure Iroui Howard Everett
tbe proof-sheets of a book whicb he bad
been examining. The boy entered the.
vast library, lined from floor to ceiling
witb books, in fear and trembling. Bat
Mr. Everett, turning from the desk where
be was writing, received tbe boy witn
reassuring courtesy, bade him sit down,
cbatted kindly as be looked for tbe proof-
sheets, and asked; "Shall I put a paper
around them for you?" as politely as if
his visitor were the President. The boy
departed in a very comfortable frame of
mind. He bad been raised io bis own
esteem by Mr. Everett s kindness, and
has never forgotten the lesson it taught
bim. '
4 Wit and Homor.
Why is the owner of two fowls, who
kills and cooks them for bis dinner, like ft
man who pays as he goes ? Five minutes
for- refreshments. Because be makes both
bees meet.
'There is nothing lo settling down," laid ft
retired merchant confidentially to his neigh
bor. "When I gave up business I settled
down and found I bad a comfortable for
tune. If I bad settled np, I sbouldu t have
hud a cent."
A clergyman of my acquaintance told -
me that be once visited a lady of bis parish
who had just lost ber husband, io order to
offer consolation, and upon her earnest in-
quincs as to tne re-amon of lamiliei in
Heaven, he strongly asserted his belief in
that fact, and when she asked witb anxie
ty whether any time mast elaspe before
friends would be able to find each other io
the next world, be emphatically saiJ, "No,
tbey will be united at once." He was
thinking of tbe happiness of being able to
fftr tbe relief of such faith, when she broke
in upon such meditations by exclaiming
sadly, "Welt, bis first wife bus got bim then,
by this time."
"Yes," said a witness, "I remember tbe
defendant's moibtr crying on tbe occasion
refrred to. She was.weepiug witb ber left
eye Uie ouly one she has and tbe tears
were ruuuiug down ber right cheek."
' What," exclaimed tbe Judge, "how could
that be ?" "lVubti ytur bouor," said tbe
witness, "Le wns awludy crosseyed."
Yuu must admit, docu r, said a witty
tidy to a ttltlfau-U dt'Cior ol divinity,
v.hu whom be was arguing tl.e question
tl ti e 'tqiiaiiiy ol the teite," "ytu must
uiiuot iLut wtotiii vub cuattd belvre
mail .'" " eil, "really, madam," said the
bsioui&litd divine, "I must at-k ynu lo prove
iii ease." "Tl ai tun be euaily uVfae, sir.
Wati ii 'Lve.tle lirst iimiu ?"
I
A little I'eilow of five going aloug the
lrett with a dtnurr fad is mopped by si
kiud-hcartcd geuiltuiau, w bo says; W litre
are you going, my little man ?" "To school.1'
And what um you do a: school? Do you
icaiu to read?" "No." "To write?''
Toccout?" "No." Wht do y on-do f
1 wait lor school to let out."
"Prisoner at the bar," said tbe judge ti
tbe mau ou trial fo' murder, "is Hate any
thibg you- wish toaay before aeuleuee w
passed upon yon?" "Judge," repliid lb
piirouer sOiineinuly," "judge there has bet a
altogether too much saaj already. 1 kuow
all along somebody would get hart if ihese
people didti'i keep their months shut. It
might as well be uie, perbap, as anybody
the. Drive ou judge, aud girt as a little
sentiment as you can gel aloof oa. I eaa
stand banging, bat I bate gush!"
V.
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