Newspapers / The Carolina Union Farmer … / June 27, 1912, edition 1 / Page 11
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Thursday, June 27, 1912.] THE CAROLINA UNION FARMER Page Eleven Humorous But Pomeroy died yesterday and new nests were found for the hens. —North Adams, Mass., Dispatch to New York Press. A German shoemaker left the gas turned on in his shop one night and upon arriving in the morning struck a match to light it. There was a ter rific explasion, and the shoemaker was blown out through the door al most to the middle of the street. A passer-by rushed to his assist ance, and, after helping him to rise, inquired if he was injured. The lit tle German gazed in at his place of business, which was now burning quite briskly, and said: “No, I ain’t hurt. But I got out shust in time, eh?’’ * * * In the hall of a Philharmonic so ciety the following notice was post ed: “The seats in this hall are for the use of the ladies. Gentlemen are re quested to make use of them only after the former are seated.” « * « “You, George Washington Calhoun Pinckney,’’ screamed his mother, “what you doin’, chile, settin’ dere a-hollerin’ an’ a-mutterin’ to yo’sef ober dat book? An’ what you froffin’ at de mouf laik dat fo’? Is you havin’ er fit?” “No, ’ndeed, maw. I’se steddyin’,” replied George, with dignity. “Steddyin’? Huh! What in de wor’ am you steddyin’?” “Nuttin’ hut my new piece to re cite, what teacher gib me.” * « « An old darkey, with an old gray mule hitched to a ramshackle wagon, stood on the incline of Capitol Hill in Washington during one of the worst third term EXCHANGE OF COMPLIMENTS. What Mr. Taft Thinks of T. R. and What T. R. Thinks of Mr. Taft— Some Warm Language. What President has said of ex- President Roosevelt and the latter’s policies: “Treason to the party.” “Unfair tactics.” “Unfounded accusations.” “He has certain faculties and ten dencies that would make it unsafe to put him back in office.” “Is unsafe, is dangerous.” “Is strong-headed.’ “Is impatient of legal restraint.” “Has very unsound constitutional views.” “An unsound man.” “Utter wreck he would have made.” “His many flimsy contests.” “Arrogance of his statements.” “A campaign of bluff and blus ter.” “A soap-box primary.” “Only his selfish ambition is to be consulted.” “Mere assertions without refer ence to records.’ “Refuses me a square deal.” “His theories crude and revolu tionary.” “I wonder why he has stopped his abuse and misrepresentations.” “He has called me every name on the calendar.” “Dangerous to give Roosevelt a sleet storms in January The old man huddled in his rab bit-skin cap, shivering; the mule was trembling with the cold. Two Con gressmen, waiting for a belated car. Were attracted by the strange^ outfit and wondered, as time went on and the darkey made no effort to depart. What ailed the old fellow. One of the Congressmen walked over and said: “Why don’t you move on, uncle?” The old darkey pointed a trem bling finger at his “team” and re plied: “ ’Cause dis yere mule won’t go ’les’ I whistle at him, and it’s so cold I cyarn’t whistle!”—Every body’s. * He * “Do you love me very much mam ma?” Mamma (a widow): “Yes, of Course, my dear.” “Then, why don’t you marry the man at the candy store?”—Life. « * « Young Doctor: “Your pulse is 150.” Patient: “Impossible, doctor.” Young Doctor: “Of course. How stupid of me. I was counting both hands together.”—Satire. * * * Parmer Rootdigger was digging out his potatoes when fourteen-year- old Sarah Deal came along on the ^ay home from school. Mr. Rootdigger asked her how their potatoes were turning out. The bright-eyed little miss replied: “Our potatoes didn’t turn out. Dad bad to dig them out.”—Exchange. When Edward D. Pomeroy was “He certainly does not lack imagi nation.” “I know the difference between truth and fiction, between a deficit 1 and a surplus.” “I know what a square deal is and I know he docs not resemble Abra ham Lincoln.” “He is fond of making general and irresponsible charges.” “I suppose I will have to look for votes among the unindicted.” What ex-President Roosevelt has said of President Taft, the National Republican Committee, etc.; “He and his advisers care nothing for the will of the people.” “Pure political brigandage.” (Taft got the six delegates-at-large in Ohio.) “One district in Alabama repre sents naked theft.” “The Taft leaders speak as if they were the regular Republicans. I do not concede that theft is a test of regularity.” “A receiver of stolens goods.” “Acts which if done to infiuence would be criminal can be perpetrated with impunity so far as national nominations are concerned.” “We have stood ’em all on their heads.” “He has no right by tricery or vio lence to try to impose his own will.” “Is neither sincere nor serious.” “The powers that prey.” “He began to wabble.” “He is not a progressive because he lacks imagination.” “He lacks sympathy.” “He is puzzle witted.” “Patronage has been used bare- buried to-day in the little mountain facedly. town of Buckland in a coffin that he | “They have tried every kind of a |]]ade with his own hands, a strange He on the canal subject.” “A dreadful doctrine.” plea made by the old man to a doctor to save his life for two weeks came to light. “Can’t you keep me alive two Weeks,” asked the ill man, anxious ly. “Why do you want to live just two Weeks?” asked the doctor. “The primaries in New York City were an infamy unmatched even by the kindred infamies perpetrated in behalf of Mr. Taft in Indianapolis and Denver.” “In the most bare-faced manner cheated the people out of their right ‘Well, you see,’ ’he replied, “I , to vote bave six hens setting in that coffin ^nd Pd rather not disturb them un- 1 they’ve hatched.” ^ me.”—Lexington Dispatch. He shows himself a reactionary.” The convention is stacked against For the benefit of our readers we give below the platform of Judge Walter Clark, well-known to Farm ers’ Union members on account of his favoring the Parcels Post and the Torrens System: PLATFORM OF. WALTER CLARK CANDIDATE FOR U. S. SENATE IN THE DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY 5 NOVEMBER, 1912. (1) Adequate and unequivocal leg islation that will destroy the Trusts. (2) Tariff for revenue only. Pro tection levies, in favor of a class, upon all other classes. It is unjust and un-Democratic. (3) Election of United States Sen ators and United States Judges by the people and the election of post masters by the people of each local ity. (4) A graduated income and in heritance tax, exempting small es- states altogether, but increasing the rate of tax for larger sums. (5) The adoption of the Initiative, the Referendum, and the Recall—the latter for such officers. State, county or town, as may be designated by law. (6) State-wide primaries for Unit ed States Senators and all State of ficers. (7) A General or Nation-wide Par cels Post, especially for the accommo dation of farmers. (8) Public regulation of railroads and other common carriers, but op eration of the telegraph and tele phones by the post-office, as in all other countries. This will give low er rates to the public, with shorter hours and better pay to employees. (9) Extension of Public Schools and good roads. (10) Enforcement of laws regulat ing hours of labor, prohibiting child labor and requiring safety appli ances. (11) He advocates the destruction of corrupt methods by strict restric tion of the purposes and amounts for which candidates, or others for them, can expend money at elections and in primaries, and full publicity of all such expenses, before and after each primary and election. (1) He also favors putting Con federate soldiers on United States Pension List, not only in justice to them, but to stop the financial drain from the South, which has already paid to Federal Pensions more than tha War Indemnity (1,000 millions dollars) which France paid to Ger many. (13) Execution in good faith after election of all pledges made before. t^Every one who favors above measures, in whole or in part, is spe cially requested to drop a postal, with his name, and that of others who favor these measures, to WALTER CLARK, (Adv.) Raleigh, N. C. We Want Agents. We want good subscrip tion agents, live wires, in every county of the State. Will pay liberal commis sions. Write for our prop osition. Carolina Union Farmer, Raleigh, N. C. FOR SALE:—Crimson Clover, Burr Clover, N C. Seed Rye, Winter Turf and Appier Oats. Write for Special Price List. Hickory Seed Co., Hickory, N. C. Take a Thirty-day Course in our sample rooms, and enter the cotton business. High salaried posi tions. Write for endorsements. Carolina Cotton Schools, Dept., U. P. 31 East Fourth street, Charlotte, N. C. F'op Sale! Some very fine pure bred York shire] Pigs now ready to ship. THE HOG FOR THE FARMER D. R. COX, Route 2, Galax, Va. FREE Beautiful Post Cards With Lovely Views of Florida. “ The Land of Flotvers ” Printed in many colors. Very Attractive. Send for Free Sample to-day. POST CARD DEALER, Baskerville, Va. Finest Cheap Farms Farminjr lands too high? Become independent raising fruits, berries, vegetables or all staple crops on cheap North Carolina and Virginia lands. $6 acre and up, easy terms. Ideal clim ate: plenty water; near good towns, railroads, churches and schools. Largo list free. (7-18) **DELLINGER’* Gastonia, N. C. UNION COTTON BAGGING CORPORATION Bagging Ties Bag Cloth NORFOLK. VA. SPARTANBURG, S. C. WRIGHT’S HOTEL and CAFE YOUR WANTS WILL BE SATISFIED AT WRIGHT’S— THE RIGHT PLACE TO EAT. Rooms of Quality Cor. Martin and Salisbury Sts. Hotel Giersch EUROPEAN PLAN 1 ' Raleigh, - N. a Farmers’ Union Badges, Watch Fobs, Minute Books, Receipts Books for Dues and Fees, Initiation Trees, Ballot Boxes, Qav- els, etc. Write for price list. UNION SUPPLY COMPANY, Marshvllle, N. C.
The Carolina Union Farmer (Charlotte, N.C.)
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
June 27, 1912, edition 1
11
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