Hai m m s
H 3 ■!*** ♦w» I )
SOMETHING TO WORRY ABOUT, AT THAT
Having noticed here of late that E. W. McDaniel has
been feeling rather low, we appointed ourself a committee of
one to call upon him and ascertain, if possible, just what he
is worried about. —. _ •
No sooner had we 1 appointed ourself than we tore out
down to his store and began to ask questions with the fol
Mr. McDaniel is worried because:
1. He is not married.
2. He can't get anyone to have him.
3. He is afraid he is going to be and old bachelor.
s 4. He realizes the truth in the following quotation
from Artemus Ward: "The happy married man dies in good
style at home surrounded by his weeping wife and children.
The old bachelor doesn't die at all—he sort of rots away like
a pollywog's tail."
Delving into the matter c
conclusion that if Mr. McDan:
rounded by a weeping wife and"
children, he would be happy, and
that he most decidedly does not
want to rot away like a polly
What have you got to worry
VINEGAR GOES UP
If in case you've noticed a sour
look on the usually serene coun
tenance of William V. Holcomb,
take note of the fact that it was
caused by a disposition soured by
five gallons of vinegar.
TRAVELERS ACCIDENT TICKETS
FOR ONE DAY OR MORE
YOU CAN NOW HAVE A BIG
NEW GENERAL ELECTRIC
—i—mini 1 1 J- * H * v
at the rate of one a minute.
Automatic THRIFT UNIT ■
ELKIN PLUMBING & HEATING CO.
Phone 254 Elkin, N. C.
arefully, we have reached the
iel could only die in style sur
It was last Thursday that some
women entered his store and ask
ed if they might have a drink of
water. "Sure," said Mr. Holcomb
as he mentally figured up the ad
ditional charge on his water bill,
"go right back there to the spig
For the benefit of anyone who
doesn't know, Mr. Holcomb keeps
a 60-gallon barrel of vinegar
right next to the water spigot,
and perhaps it was but a natural
error that the women instead of
THE ELKIN TRIBUNE, ELKIN, NORTH CAROLINA
turning on the water, pulled, the
wooden spigot from the bunghole
of the barrel . . . anyway, a few
minutes later Mr. Holcomb hap
pened to glance to the rear of his
store to see the women in question
daintily wading thither and yon
in Ave gallons of Mr. Holcomb's
best Sunday-go- to-meeting vine
gar as it spread Itself in a grow
ing and ever-widening pool upon
the floor. •
Yessir, the price of vinegar has
taken a rise—due to an acute
THIS AND THAT
Just by way of warning we fig
ured we- ought to tell you that we
are working on a program to be
staged at the Lyric theater the
23rd of this month for the bene
fit of the Presbyterian church
This program will NOT be an
amateur show, and it will not last
over 45 minutes or an hour at
most, and will feature an amaz
ing array of talent. Fact is. the
more we think about it, the more
amazed we get.
Among those who have so kind
ly consented to take part are By
ron Bryan, who will take care of
the comedy and is the only per
son we know of who can extract
music from a wash tub; Miss Jer
ry Weaver, of Brook's Cross Roads
who sings and sings well; Misses
Ruth Beulln and Edna Billings,
who can harmonize on most any
time; Charles Pardue and his
band; Leon Martin, whose lyric
tenor was the subject of much
favorable comment on the part of
officials of the Greensboro radio
station when we were there last
fall; and Hal Dobbins, a young
man very few of you have ever
heard sing but whom we expect
to make a decided hit.
Miss Dorothy Colhard has very
kindly consented to accompany,
at the piano and be a great help
in other ways, and we, who here
tofore have confined ourself to.
doing all the worrying, have de
cided to kick over the traces and
amaze and thrill the audience, if
any, with a French horn solo.
Although we haven't fully decid
ed, we are thinking of playing
Schubert's Serenade, and that
ought to be something.
We're telling you all this so if
you haven't planned to be out of
town that night you can get busy
now and buy a ticket to Asia or
• * •
Funny, isn't it? Once upon a
time you had to walk a mile for
a Camel. Now they give you a lift.
That's service, if you ask us.
Ronda, Route 2, July s.—Mrs.
I Bell, the county nurse, from Wil
-1 kesboro, was at this place last
Friday giving the typhoid vacci
nation, and will be here on Fri
day for the next three weeks.
Mrs. Tom Pardue and little
daughter, from near Raleigh, are
here visiting in the home of Mr.
and Mrs. Max B. Pardue.
Mrs. J. Paul Qilliam and son,
Samuel, of Statesville, have re
cently spent a few days here with
Mr. Gilliam's sister, Mrs. J. T.
Triplett and Mr. Triplett.
The choir of the church here
attended the singing at the court
house at Wilkesboro last Sunday
afternoon, seven choirs and quar
tets participated in the services.
Hugh Oreen of Winston-Salem,
was the guest of his mother and
family here the 4th Sunday.
Mrs. Luther QiUey and little
son, Danny, have been spending
the past three weeks with her
parents, Mr. and Mrs. Dan Cock
erham at Low Gap.
Misses Norma Gilliam and Paul
ine Morrison were the guests of
former's aunt the past week-end,
Mrs. W. R. Stroud of Wilkesboro.
Mr. and Mrs. J. T. Stroud and
family and Mr. and Mrs. Seaman
Dobbins of Elkin, were visitors in
this home Sunday, where Mrs.
Stroud was entertaining at din
ner for her husband on his birth
Mr. D. S. Gilliam took his
mother and sister, Mrs. C. W. Gil
liam, Sr. and Mrs. W. H. Jones to
Elkin Monday morning to see
Mrs. C. W. Gilliam, Jr. and their
new granddaughter and niece who
was born at the Hugh Chatham
Memorial Hospital, Sunday, July
Little Hattie Durham of Swan
Creek has been spending the past
week here visiting her sister, Mrs.
Martin P. Green.
Mr. and Mrs. E. L. Ferlazzo and
little son, Eddie, "of Winston-Sa
lem, visited relatives here last
Sunday. Mrs. J. B. Armstrong and
a friend, also spent a while here.
They were accompanied here by
Flake Gilliam who has been
spending some time In that city
Mr. and Mrs. John Smith of
Elkin and Mrs. Cailie Waddell,
also of Elkin visited their aunt
and sister, Mrs, N- E. Burchett
and Mr. Burchett last Sunday.
Mrs. Burchett' has been right sick
but is better we are glad to note.
Miss Mae Johnson of this place
and Ralph Pinnix of Elkin were
married last Saturday. We wish
them much happiness.
Miss Nannye' Sue Burchett
came up from Greensboro last
Saturday to spend the 4th with
her parents, Mr. and Mrs. Dewitt
Mr. and Mrs. Chas. T. Jones
spent last Sunday night and
Monday in Winston-Salem with
"You can get anything from "a
mail-order house," remarked the
lady next door.
"Everything, alas, but a male,"
sighed the spinster.
Dr. Chas. W. Moseley
Diseases of the Stomch
Office over Brame's Drug Store
Mondays only beginning
Hours 9 A. M. to 5 P. M.
AT THE LYRIC
SPECIAL! Don't Miss the Two big Pictures to
be Shown Today and Friday! A Big Show
Each Day! See—
TODAY (THURSDAY) ONLY—
THE LOVABLE STARS
OF VAH! WILDERNESS"
return in a drama with
the power of "Fury"! A
hit picture as American
as "Yankee Doodle" .
and JUST AS SWELL!
f ")NEL BARRYMORE »
'•CECILIA PARKER Movietone
MICKEY ROONEY IXeWS
CHARLEY GRAPEWIN \ A „
Directed by George B. S.iU ACIIIIISSIOII
S ble PI&!
Selected Short Adm. 10c-25c
Short Adm. 10c-25c
JOHNNY MACK BROWN
"BAR Z BADMEN"
Cartoon—Serial—Comedy Adm. 10c-3Qc
| ADMINISTRATION NOTICE
Having qualified as Adminis
trator of Mrs. Florence A. Shores,
I hereby notify all persons* in
debted to her estate to come for
ward and make payment; and all
persons holding claims against
said estate will present them to
me within twelve months, or* this
notice will be plead in bar of
This 15th day of June, 1937.
R. C. HALSEY, Sparta, N. C.,
Administrator 6. t. a. of Mrs.
Florence A. Shores. 7-8
Eyes Examined Office:
Glasses fitted Elkin National Bank Buildln*
DR. P. W.GREEN
Offices open daily for optical repairs and adjustments of all kinds.
Eliminations on Tuesdays and Fridays from 1 to 5 p. m.
By Appointment Phone 140
Electric and Acetelyne Welding
CALL ON US FOR YOUR EVERY NEED
DOUBLE EAGLE SERVICE CO.
Phone 43 Elkin, N. C.
NEXT WEEK, MONDAY-TUESDAY—
_oniy h ° a * kUl
—;r ME d*w«"-
slltA U Y
iM JOHN W*« H . A IAN 01 MS HA«
News—Cartoon Adm 10c-30c
"MAN IN EXILE"
ADMISSION ONLY 10c
* • '
COMING JULY 15-16
Bing Crosby, Bob Burns in Waikiki Wedding
"ROMEO AND JULIET'
With Norma Shearer and Leslie Howard
LAUREL AND HARDY IN "AWAY OUT WEST"
And—On The Stage
"THE 810 LAMBAST OF 1937"
Featuring Local Talent
Thursday, July 8, 1937
AT THE LYRIC