North Carolina Newspapers

NO. 7
c y
The Major Writes on Sundry Ques
tionsMrs. Bilkins Organized a
Burglar Scare and Caused Lots of
Trouble-fir. Bilkins Tries the Vir
tues of a Famous Home Remedy
Prefers the Disease Rather Than
the Cure.
Correspondence of the EnterDrise.
Wimin air a lot ov trubel, an' still
I reckon they air a lot ov comfort,
too. Betsy cum purty nigh runnin'
me distrackted one nite last week,
an' awl erbout nothin', too. She hed
bin readin' erbout burglers an' high
way robbers till she begun ter think
that we couldn't git through another
nite without havin' the house robbed
an' awl ov us killed. Betsy waked me
up punchin' me in the ribs an' whis
pered that they wuz a burgler in the
house a-stealin evervthin' down
stairs. "You air dreamm'." sed I.
She 'lowed: "No I ain't: I herd him
walkin' plain az day." "Well I'd
ruther let 'em carry off a few things
than ter go down thar an' git as
sassinated, sed I.
"My lands," sed Betsy, "didn't I
allers hear you talkin' erbout whut
you'd do if burglers ever cum foolin'
eround? Now here you air a-tryin'
ter crawfish You air a nurtv con-
sterable and justis ov the peece ter
lie m bed an' let 'em take everv
thing in the house. I'll git the poker
an go down an clean 'em up mv-
Betsy hed touched a tinder snot
when she menshuned mv bein' an' of- bee-hives an' ax the bees ter cum an'
fiser ov the law. In the curmoshun I sting you, or do you hev ter punch
I hed clean fergot that. "Awl rite." 'em with a stick an' take whut they
. . -a .
sez 1, sorter cam-like, "you .list go ter give you till you git tired r
sleep an keep frum gittin' scared: "Land sakes I don't know how hit
I'll git my pistle an' if they iz env iz wurked." sez Betsv: "but wa kin if
burglers downstairs they'll soon look others kin. Take off your shirt so
an' armed with Gatlin' guns. By this
time my knees wuz bumpin' tergeth-
er an 1 lelt a chokin' sensashun
like a man dyin' frum SDontanyus
cumbustshun. After listemn' an'
hearin' nothin', I sed nurty loud: "If
thar iz enyone m my house I com
mand you in the name ov Guvernor
Glenn an' the ballance ov the State
ov North Carolina ter disperse forth
with or you or they will git the full
penalty az made an' nurvided." Awl
at once a cat begun ter howl. "Th-a-t
i-z th-e bur-g-lar," sed Betsy; an' I
knowed hit wuz, too. Hit wuz a
stray cat, an' I reckon we hed shut
hit up before we went ter bed an' hit
couldn't git out an' hed made the
noise Betsy sed she herd.
But that hain't the worst trubel
Betsv hez got me into sinse I writ
you last. I got up the other mornin'
wiui one ov tne worst cases ov
rheumatiz you ever red ov. I could-
n t sit up nor lie down. I did'nt
think hit would last long fer hit cum
on so bad rite at once I knowed the
rheumatiz couldn't keep up that lick
long. "Why don't you try the bee-
stmg cure F sed Betsy ; "hit will
cure you, the patters sa-T, an' you will
never hev hit ergin." "I've red that,
too," sed I, "an' I'll bet sum polly-
tishun got that up ter beat the other
candydate." "No hit iz true," sed
Betsy ; "I've red hit lots ov times.
Hit will be sorter paineful fer a lit
tle while, but thet beats sufferin' fer
years." '.; '.; . '
"How, do you wurk hit?" sez I.
"Do you go an' stand in front ov the
an' several more cum out an' looked
at me in a solium manner.
Betsy wuz huntin' fer a stick ter
stir 'em up. Sez I: "Do the bees
take vour temoeratur, look at your
tongue or feel your pulse ter
whut the truble iz?"
"You keep quiet an' don't spring
eny ioohshness, sed Betsy; "bees
don't purtend ter cure enything but
rheumatizum, an' thev guess that
folks know whut iz the matter when
thev call fer physick." "Now cum-
pose yourself," continued Betsy,
vou will soon be a well man."
She begun ter beat on the side ov
the hive with the stick an' the bees
beo-un ter boil out lookin' az mad
az wet hens. I reckon one ov them
pinted out my bare shoulder, fer er
bout a hatful ov 'em lit on hit an' I
soon thought that sumbody wuz
shootin' red-hot needles into mv
shoulder with a Mouser riffel. I
lumped up an' run fer the house.
yell in' : "Take 'em off, take 'em off.
they air killin' me." Betsy run an'
knocked 'em off of me with her
apron an' tuk me in the house. You
never seed sich a shoulder az I had
in an hour. Hit swelled ter kill, an'
hit iz sore yit. But the rheumatiz
took a hike an' left fer narts un
known. I'm still debatin' whether the
medisin ain't wurse than the diseese
like a pepper-box lid." I got my
pants on in a jiffy an' started ter
put on my shoes an' dropned one ov
em on the floor. Hit made a noize
loud enuff ter wake the nabors.
Betsy 'lowed: "YouH scare 'em awl
erway." Ter awl intints an' purposes
I wuz tryin' ter keep auiet theoret
J. 1 11 1 . .1 -r i.i4.
ncKaiiy, dui secretly x didn't care
how much racket that shoe made. At
last I go mv shoes on an' started
fer the door leadin' etr the stairs.
Bets" sed she wuz goin' with me an'
die with me. "Go back," sez I. "one
ov us iz enuff ter be sackerfised
on the alter ov duty." I could tell
bv hlQ flTYIQ mn rrltl-n
scared rite. Cold chills were sorter
chasm' up an' down my SD.vnall col
lum. But I couldn't erfford ter back
out. We went slippin' erlong ter the
hed ov the stairs an' stopped ter
listen. Everything wuz quiet. I
tried ter git Betsy ter go back. Sez
I. out loud : "If they iz enybody
in this house thev will soon think
that Togo hez made a midnite attack
with hiz warshins an' torpedo boats,
fer my pistle will shoot six miles."
I thought thet would make the enemy
retreat if he wuz up ter hiz busi
ness. But I couldn't hear enybody
gittin' out;. By this time my teeth
wuz rattlin' tergether an' my back
bone felt like sixteen feet ov the
North Pole. I felt sorter sea-sick
an' wished I hed a lemon ter suck.
If Betoy hadn't bin rite with me I
would hev gone back an' reported
nothin' doin'. By this time we wuz
half way down-stairs. Them burg
lers, if they wuz eny thar, eeemed
they kin git at your shoulder an' we
will try the remedy."
The Tribute of Suffering.
It is those whom we love most
upon whom we lay the heaviest bur
dens. We do not turn to strangers
or nutried acquaintances when we
would lean hard on some one in a
crisis of life. We tax most those
whom we trust most. And what is
true of our relations with each other
is true of the Father's relations with
His children. He does not send
stress and burdens to weaklings. "God
I agreed, fer I wuz sufferin' turri- I must love you very much to trust you
ble. Betsy put on her bonnet an' I" with such suffering," said one to a
tied a hankercheef eround part ov I friend whose burden seemed unbear-
her face an' nut on sum thick gloves. I able. But God does for us what we
We marched out ter whar the bees I cannot do for each other; with the
air. I felt wurse than I ever did I suffering He sends the strength to
when I wuz goin' ter hev a tooth I bear it. Every fresh burden is proof
pulled or when I wuz reddy ter git I f His love, of His confidence in us,
married. I hed put a sheet over my I oi Ills plans ior our rehnmg. Ji.very
rite shoulder and kept the left one I new test brings with it more than
bare so the bees wouldn't treat one I enough of His strength to meet it
shoulder fer rheumatiz an' the other
fer newmony or sumthin' else like
sum ov the other docktors. The bees
were goin' out ov the boxes an' cum
in' back ergin like they never got
tired. "Bees may know how ter dock
tor hives," sed I, "but I'll be blamed
if they kin cure a stubborn diseese
like rheumatiz."
"Try 'em anyhow," sed Betsy.
"Hit won't cost enything if hit don't
cure you.
triumphantly. And as we look back
at our past experiences, we see now
the reason for rejoicing in every
such experience. Could we order our
lives better ? Sunday-school Times.
King Oscar has had a good chance
to see how capable Crown Prince
Gustaf is of governing the kingdom,
but he doesn t show any inclination
to stand aside permanently and let
Git down on your knees the young man have the job. Boston
an turn your lelt shoulder ter the
hive like a smart boy." "Awl rite,"
sed I, "but remember that my blood
will be upon your hed if they kill
"Nonsence," sed Betsy, "a few bee
stmgs never killed enybody." I fol-
lered the direckshuns an' got down
on my knees. A few old lazy bees
were sittin' eround the little doors
ter the hive an' they sorter bowed up
their backs an' Jooked ajt me az if
surprized at the way I wuz acktin.'
"I'm the first pashunt these bees ever
hed," sez I, "an' Fiji bet tihey give me
The Beef Trust officials who are
on the way to Europe must have
taken steerage passage. Men who
have been losing money at the rate
Mr. Garfield says the Beef Trust has
could hardly afford to travel first
class. Kansas City Journal.
per m -tw be about ten feet hifbl lnt& wWr m F? Chronicle,
A Chicago woman shot and killed
her husband to keep him at home.
And yet, unless she took the precau
tion to provide herself with a cold
storage plant, her plans mav slightly
interfere with the rules of the Chica-
p-o Health Department. Augusta
Some Nuts That Are Up to the News
and Observer to Crack.
To the Editor of the Morning Post:
I just want space enough to ask a
few questions about passes and "pass
toters." The News and Observer has
been indulging in a lot of wild and
reckless talk about the use of passes
by railroad directors, and has been
particularly exercised over the "tot
ing" of a pass by J. Elwood Cox, of
High Point. That paper has alleged
that Mr. Cox was influenced to give
testimony in favor of the railroads
before the Senate committee on rate
regulation, by his railroad pass. It
has not, however, been charged that
Mr. Cox was in possesssion of a pass
in violation of law.
All this reminds me of a story I
have heard concerning the way the
business manager of the News and
Observer, Mr. W. II. Bagley, who is
a brother-in-law of the editor, attach
ed himself to passes that are good
over the Atlantic Coast Line, the
Seaboard Air Line and the Southern
Railway, which said nasses hf nspa
freely for the benefit of the News
and Ubserver. Mr. Bagley, so the
story goes, secured those passes by
virtue of a directorship which he
holds with the Atlantic and lorth
Carolina Railroad, an appointment
he received at the hands of Governor
Aycock. while that road was under
the control of the State.
Now. did Mr. Daniels, the editor
of the News and Observer, ask for
that appointment for Mr. Bacrlev in
- - - i
order that his paper might get the
beneht oi the passes ?
And after he had been usincr 'the
passes about a year was it not found,
upon investigation, that Mr. Bagley
was not a stockholder fas reouired
by law) in the road of which he was
a director (
When this discovery was madp. did
not some person borrow a few shares
oi stock for Mr. Bagley and cause
them to be transferred to him on the
booLs of the company in order to
cure the defect and thus qualify him
as a director?
And is not Mr. Baelev still a di
rector in the Atlantic and North
Carolina Railroad on the strenerth of
borrowed stock, and still using the
passes obtained from that source for
the service of the News and Obser
ver and for the benefit of Mr. Jose-
phus Daniels?
Was Mr. Bacrlev made a direntnr in
that road in order that tho influence
of passes might close the mouth of
the News and Observer while the
investigation of chareres acrainst thfi
management of that road was going
on? ' '
If not, then why was it done?
Were there not enoucrh bona fide
stockholders to occupy all the direc
If the editor of the News and Ob
server was not influenced in favor of
the Atlantic and North Carolina
Railroad management by the passes
obtained for his business manager,
why should he charere Mr. Cox with
being influenced by the pass he holds?
Is the integrity of the News and Ob
server, or its editor, of a higher de
gree than that of other mortals?
And lastly, what do people who
live in glass houses want to be throw
ing stones for? J, M,
(treensborp, Jf, Q M&y 30,

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