1 f r
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7
THE
erpnse
VOL. II.
RALEIGH, N. C, THURSDAY, AUGUST 24, 1905.
NO. 19
0 n
T TV
1L
BIL KINS IN BALTIMORE.
He Finds an Up-to-Date Town But
the Date Is in Doubt History and
Antiquity Are Paramount Valuable
Facts About the Monumental City.
Baltimore, Md., Aug. 22.
Correspondence of the Enterprise.
I left Washington Monday. I did
n't git things fixed up jist like I
wanted them erbout that muskeeter
buziness, fer the Preserdent got busy
tryin' ter make them Rushyans an'
Japs kiss an' make up. They air
reddy ter kiss an' make up, but the
Rushyans wanter git ora the free list
an' let the Japs foot their own bills.
Me an' the 'Preserdent desided that
Rushy would hev ter pay sumpthin'
or fite a gude deal, an' we ain't per
tickler which.
When I left Washington the Pres
erdent sed he wuz powerful sorry he
hod ter stop rite in the middle ov our
wurk an' made me promise ter stop
ter see him when I go back South,
lie sez : "Zeke, them Rushyans an'
Japs air more trubel ter me than
raisin' a family ov step-children. But
I think a whole lot ov them on both
sides, an' I want ter see peece, so I'm
goin' ter put in a few day's wurk er
long the line." .
I tole him I wuz with him, an' if
I could help him eny ter write at
once. .
I cum over here on the B. fe O,
rode on a train called the congreshu
nal limited. Hit runs so fast hit
takes two ingineers ter wurk hit.
When one ingineer starts the train
at Washington the other begins ter
stop hit. By the time he gits hit
stopped hit iz at Baltimore.
Baltimore iz lokated on Jones' Run
betwixt Emery Grove an' Haverde
grass. The leadin' industyrs air
Lexington Market, Elecktrick Park,
Floods an' Back River. They iz
awlso two telephone companies, an'
':rerytime one ov them tries ter pat
up a new pt le sumbudy jumps in tlw
hole an' Mays thar so they can't ; ec
up the t le. This iz called the poie
war. The poles air bought in Pomd.
Most ov the populashun ov Baltim : e
don't do orythin' but keep the tole
phone folks f rum puttin' up polos.
Az the company can't put up p:l s,
hit refuses to pay pole tax.
Edgar Allan Poe, who' invented
poetry, which wuz named after him,
wuz a sitizen ov Baltimore a gude
meny years ergo before they got
elecktrick cars an' cobbel-stones on
the streets. Mr. Poe fussed a gudo
deal erbout pecple pasturin' their
cows on the streets,- an' hiz nabors
chickens scratched up hiz gardin.
Bein' a nervous feller, he razed a
crude deal ov sand. One day he writ
sum poetry an' couldn't think ov eny
thing else an' called hit "Poe's Ra
vin'." bekase he wuz feelin' thet way.
The poetry attrackted a gude deal ov
attcnshun awl over the country ,az fur
az Hagcrstown, an' Baltimore becum
talked erbout. Things stood purty
quiet fer a long time after that in
uaiximore uii wuwun uauo f,ui
ter boomin'.
The furst railrode in the wurld wuz
built f rum Baltimore ter Washing
ton. Hit iz now called the Baltimore
and Ohio. When ehybody wanted ter
git ter Washington quick they tuk a
horse an' buger, fer hit tuk awl day
ter make hit on the train, ihe pa?
sfine-ers would take their dinners er-
iong an' the train would stop an hour
fer dinner at the half-way house an'
the passengers an' crew made coffee
in the ingine. After dinner the train
would go ter Washington. Hit takes
40 minits now fer the trip.
In the depoes at Baltimore an'
Washington they had a sine which
red : "The train will start at the
usual hour if the weather be good."
No trains wuz run on rainy days.
In them days the Baltimore ladies
wuz so shy they wouldn't rrde on the
train till they hed bin interdused ter
the conducktor.
Baltimore is full ov old families,
historickal an' other antick things ;
also cobble-stones. Purty nigh every
family hes a family tree an' a lot ov
old furniture an' sich like. Sum ov
the leadin' sitizens hev tombstones in
the parks either before or after thoy
die, an' that iz why hit iz called "the
monumental city."
The demand fer antick furniture
iz so grate in Baltimore that several
factories in Michygan air makin' hit
'specially fer the Baltimore trade,
an' lots oy furniture stores handle
nothin' else. New furniture hez ter
be sold on the installment plan; but
this antick furniture brings several
times az much an' they will pay gold
or eny other sort ov cash.
Baltimore wuz a sort of baokard
city till they hed a big fire thar more(
than a year ergo. The people in oth
er places wuz sorry fer Baltimore an'
wanted ter help them out by donatin'
a few million dollars. But sum ov
thtr-wise peeple " thar seed that hit
wuz jist whut the town needed an'
sed, "No, thank you, we will fite hit
out rite on the ashes," and hit proved
the makin' ov the town. They air
buildin' hit up purty nigh az quick
az hit burnt down an' hev voted for
a sewerage system anV other things
an' hev noterfied New York that she
will hev ter hurry.
They manufacture clothin', hats,
shoes, beer an' whiskey in Baltimore
an' a few other things ; that's all.
Justis Garland an' I. Freeman
Rasin air the prinsiple sitizens ov
the town since Senator Gorman
swallowed up the Sugar Trust an'
moved to his country sweet.
Baltimore iz an' up-ter-date city,
but hit ain't dated an' I can't tell
jist whut date hit iz up to. But in
ten years hit will begin ter look like
a modern city. A few merchants hev
awlredy begun ter advertise in the
papers. They air outsiders, though,
who hev drifted in f rum sumwhar
else. The natives air still wntin
their advertisements on the pavmints
and sendin' out hand-bills.
The folks in Baltimore hev sorter
got reckonsiled ter street cars, but
they make the railrode trains run
under the ground till they git out ov
the town.
Yonrs on the wing,
ZEKE BILKINS.
The Idlewild Farmers' Club.
Reported for the Enterprise.
"What in thunder is the matter V.
asked an excited member soon after
the echo of I. Hoe's horn of as
apmhlv had died awav among the de
files and fastnesses of the Hill. "Must
hflvfl a meetincr toMiierht, Josh is com
ing to see us. Let's give the old man
off" "Good! I'll go round
and tell the boys to be at the barn at
early candlelight." Now, Josh is a
character. A solid, level-headed old
farmer. Religious to a degree; tern-,
perance to two degrees doesn't
drink anything but hard cider, corn
whisky, the fruit brandies, and a lit
tle water occasionally.
The hour of meeting arrived; so
did the members ; candles were light
ed, seats arranged, and the member
ship called to order, and dues col
lected, and as Mr. I. Hoe was about
to explain the reason of the call, a
loud "Whoa, Blaze, gol dam ye, don't
smash the fence down !" And, Josh
had arrived. In a moment he was
being greeted by "the gang" down in
the barn yard, all greeting at once,
and one or two rummaging the hay
and fodder in the wagon-bed. "Here,
you boys git out'n that," called Un
cle Josh, who moved the seat aside
and pulled out a five-gallon jug with
cob stopper, which was totted up
stairs, and a member rushed down to
the house after tin-cups and dippers
to come back limping and explaining
that he fell over that durned bull calf
of I. Hoe's and wrenched his ankle
and sprained his shoulder. "Just
bathe it with a quart of this good old
hard cider," Uncle Josh suggested.
"Oh ! oh ! such a waste !" went up in
chorus.
"Now, boys," said Uncle Josh, af
ter he had filled up' all round and
had taken a position a-straddle of
the jug, "I was down here about three
weeks ago to see the State Fair folks
and find out if they was going to hold
a high moral show fit for a deacon
and a father to go into. I wanted
them to put a muzzle on I. Hoe, for
he took me around to the other J? air,
and he know'd all the gals, and show
ed me such cuttings up as set nie
thinking even in sermon time; and
I don't want to see them agai n, for
I've seen 'em once. And I wanted a
drink one day while I was here; I
heard there wasn't no bar-rooms in
the town, so I asked a man with a red
nose where I could 'tret a drink. He
said: "The dispensary is over there."
It looked like a common, low-down
whiskey shop, so I went in. I never
was in a dispensary before, and I'll
never go again less I want a drink
of the meanest corn whiskey on earth.
I watched other folks, for I didn't
know how to act, and I bought a
half -pint of corn, and pulled the cork
out, when the feller that sold it to
me yelled out: "You can't drink that
in here." I had already got a taste,
and said : "That's so. stranger: that
stuff will kill at forty rods. I'll go
out in the woods and drink the rest,
where it won't hurt no one but me,
I'm told that place is run by the best
people; that they voted to hire men
to sell that stuff ; why, it'll burn the
insides out in thirty-seven days; and
that they keep that place and sell
that stuff to stop drunkenness. Well,
it'll do it, for it'll kill everybody
that uses it. I just looked round to
see who Avas running' the shop. There
was six 'good men,' I suppose, hand-
intr it out as fast as they could ;
there was another solemn looking
man sittintr back among the barrels,
They said he was a deacon. Was
he there watching to see if any of
his flock came in? I don't know, but
he looked mitrhty solemn. That kind
of whiskey selling makes sneaks out
of a man, so I sneaked out and went
to a vacant lot beh ind a store and
drank the balance of what I bought."
"Boys, brine up your dippers !" and
Uncle Josh filled up again.
After they had all bragged over the
old man's cider, and looked for more,
Uncle Josh took up his speech where
he left off.
"I can't for the life of me see what
right a 'good man' has to claim that
a 'good man' has a right to engage
in or to indorse the whiskey business,
call it by any name you please. And
the ground upon which they do so is
a quick-sand that w ill '. swallow them
up sooner or later -that is, if they
patronize their own shop. The ef
fect of whiskey is the same upon a
man whether sold by a member of a
church, or by a low-down sinner of
a bar-keeper. One is just as much
responsible for the making of a
drunkard or pandering to a drunk
ard's appetite, and the consequent
pauperizing of his dependents, as the
other. And. there is many a 'good
man' who honestly thought in the be
ginning that he was doing right, but
now knows that he is doing wrong,
and has done wrrong all the time, but
hasn't the manhood or moral cour
age to say so. Some of the money
goes, they tell me, to ' schools. : Isn't
it 'tainted money,' I wonder, that is :
taken from one man's unfortunate
children and triven to another man's
fortunate children? Some goes to
make good roads. That is better, for
the farmer that starts from Raleigh
witn a .lugiui ot tne stun tnat i
bought, runs less risk of having his
neck broken by his mules when he
gets too drunk to guide them to his
home. And I am told that the taxes
of Raleigh have been reduced ten
cents on the hundred dollars. And
the whole thing finally simmers down
to dollars to cents ; to cents against
souls. It won't do to roll up your
eyes and ask argum'entativcly, 'Am I
my brother's keeper V "
"Say, boys, we'd better pull the
.stopper again, for this is mighty dry
talk I'm giving you ; but I don t get a
chance at you often." And the stoi-
per was duly pulled.
After; tlie participants had wiped
their respective moustaches on their
shirt-sleeves, and again eulogized Un
cle Josh's cider, the old patriarch re
sumed: "As I said, this dispensary business
makes sneaks out of men. They won't
let you drink the stuff there, so the
stores and backyards and alleys are
turned into tiopling-places especial
ly on Saturdays by both niggers and
whites. The store-keepers complain,
but are afraid to say anything for
they might lose trade dollar against
principle again! But I made a dis
covery. Next door is what was once
a saloon; now a tippling shop. Buy
your bottle for fifty cents and take
it in there, get a glass and pay two
and a half cents for its use ? How
ridiculous ! Your liquor will cost a
dollar a pint at least. And there is the
worst kind of treating, too instead
of doing away with treating.
"Let there be prohibition. Let the
offense of selling the stuff be punish
ed by fine so heavy that i t will stop
the sale or manufacture for the dol
lars will rule then, as now. But be
fore that comes let's finish the cider."
And the jug was emptied.
The members dispersed; some tum
bled down the ladder; others fell
asleep on the way home; but we had
all listened to a splendid temperance
lecture that no doubt will benefit
everyone.
Uncle Josh will come again, soon.
I. HOE, Secretary.