WHAT'S THE USE
By L. F. Van Zelm
N^rf|?N(#r tnkm
FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE / IZ
WHAT DO "YOU MEAM, GETTifS6
YouC HAIC Cur IN YOUC OFFICE *
WELL, Iff
Didn't
Sure, Mike
G/2EW HEGP V
,T ? ')
VArt CElM
[ i THE PRINTER'S DEVIL
^ ! dO^ VAC
r . . of OOvi \
..,v,^ <X \
- s\ v^. A , PGtfBW
^ >>-10 -\-V?
By Charles Sughro*
O Worn Nmpfn UmJM
fo&ot UOOWY \ Oo^r HE^~
J '3YAGK. UP IW-P&S.lUG'1. Ktos
pOLKS ARE SCARED OF
COP? 0UY TUlQ oue DOUY
BLUFF ME UOWEl MOPE \
M'9EE, VAE
uwjes isecc
^(^OOOR.
Ha! Ha!
auo uis\h\pe
ww ueic '?ka I
W
5 Hi
&' _
^ '0>
Along the Concrete
Our Pet Peeve
I WHAT ?// THE ,
Hla w
x UftP MONEY
^ Tywj-oo/
^:r y, h.\T I TKAPEP
f?R THAT OL'
r^WN X'T Of >0UCS
5 ,o
v Vi^<
?i &&&
(Copyrtffet, W. N. U.)
IOME WANTED FOR A BABY
vteu UeRe-5
One KlO vmho
\fOtiT B?
, O?At?0 That
.. v/At! >
iKUWteTrJ
&Eueve
I'LL TP^
ACAirt?
WOW I
THE
ANCY
kids
'^an Runt Got H
>s
A L
? 1
h*1 ? ^TPir:'"r';i-! :'"tery
^bulutor.
SHE COULD
TELL.
Hubby: I've
been gambling
again, honey.
Wlfey: I can
tell by the ex
pression on your
face that It isn t
up to me to call
you down for It
this time.
If a man is happily married he if
transported for Uf*
QUITE
CORRECT
T e a char:
Why are the
days so short In
the winter?
Dull Boy: I
guess It must
be 'cause the
nights are to
'on0
Matrimony carries off more single
girls (ban any o^her epidemic.
s
be careful.
A brittle thing is
speech; s o
take
Prec&ut lona
how you
break it.
For any man can
make a
break,
But mighty
few can
mend it.
Genius may be a disease, but
one of us wishes to be Imjnqns.
not
NOT MEANING
TO KNOCK.
So sorry I
couldn't see you
when you called,
but I 'vyas Just
having my hair
washed.
And the laun
dries are so pro
voklngly slow
about returning
things!
It's a poor fare that can't acquire
a mortgage,
GENEROUS T
Willie: Say,
Sis, Mr. Tomp
kins is a gener
ous feller, ain't
he? He gave me
a quarter to keep
outer de parlor
last night.
Sis: That's the
only money rve
known him to
spend since I've
known him.
Adulation is the death of TktOfc
Ostentation
The honest hen unheeded goes.
For praise she'll feebly beg.
The way the rooster struts and crow*?
You'd think he laid the egg I
Had Trouble
"Didn't you say this car would do
! seventy-five miles un hour without any
trouble?" asked the recent purchaser
1 of the agent.
"Yes," was the reply. "Didn't she?"
"She did seventy-five nil rltfht, but
the trouble I got Into cost me $20 and
I costs."
Puzzled Her
| Four-year-old Dorothy had Just
heard Ijer mother giving a grocery or
! der over the telephone.
"Mamma," she said, "did you order
6ome corn starch?"
"Yes, dear."
i "What for?" asked Dorothy. "Is you
goin' to launder your corns?"
Fed Up
Wife ? Would you like some nice
waffles this morning, dear?
Hub ? No, thank you, Helen. Thpy
look too huch like fried cross-word
puzzles, and I'm fed up <>u those.
i BORN REAL ESTATE MAN
T-i ? y ^ , ? iir.TZ?
Scraps,
of
Humg
DIPLOMACY WINS
"Go away nt once," she said. "We
don't want any pots and pans."
"But I want to sec the lady of the
house," insisted the peddler.
"Well, use your eyes then," re
torted the lady.
"But surely you are not the lady
of the house," Insisted the man. "I
should have sworn that you were the
youngest daughter."
"I'll have that cabbage strainer,"
she said.
NO GREATER LOVE
Miss Mouse ? Are you sure you love
me?
Mr. Mouse ? More than I do my
cheese, dearest!
"You say he's a born real eat at*
man?"
"Undoubtedly; he's made no end of
people believe they'd enjoy a ull?
walk from a house to a car line.
One Way to Hold Him
When Joy Is on his Journey
We ask him In to Btay,
And give him such a high old tiro*
He never goes away!
Chance of a Lifetime
The 80-pound husband was the de
fendant and the 200-pound wife was
the plaintiff.
"And why did you slap your wife's
face Instead of helping her when the
automobile knocked her down?" In
quired the Judge.
"Well, your honor," replied the
diminutive husband, "opportunity
knocks but once." ? American Legion
Weekly.
f
Found the Hole
"I meant to have tould you of that
hole," said an Irishman to his friend,
who was walking with him in his gar
den, and tumbled Into a pit full of
water.
"No matter," said bis friend, blow
ing the mud and water out of his
mouth, "I've found It."
Mourning Not Becoming "*
Mr. Glummer ? If I should die beftfre
you I hope you won't wear mournin'.
His Wife ? I won't. I tried on some
last winter when you were so ill and
It made me look ten years older.
A Rare Opportunity
Father? So you are finding out that
married life has Its troubles?
Daughter ? Yes. Sometimes Henry
simply won't listen to reason.
Father ? He ought to be ashamed of
himself. Not every married man has
the chance.
Under No Obligations
Mr. IilufT? Whatever I have accom
plished, I owe it to myself.
Mr. Wire ? How delightful It must be
to feel so clear of debt !
Worth It
Visitor ? You must be glad to
have your daughter home again.
Host ? Yes, she's beeh flnishlnf;
she's cost a lot of money, but It ain't
been wasted. Wa're very proud of 'er
?she won't "ardly speak to mother an*
me, now."
Garruloau
"Mrs. Blank is a fine talker, Isn't
she?"
"One of the best I ever escaped
from."