ONERS’ BEGINNING , Jinivs for reading: The requirement ft:reading thii M novel of the ages is that EMhM be born into a silly After which, you -m-1 ' *W craay. have complied with the then you should follow ing carefully: Walk he Week nine times upon hands; have a blacksmith an the head with a sledge ner ; go down and make a face |i|etnan; poke your wife nr tin the eye twice, ant! then Straight-jacket) r *we are read for the syn tt- JBUPSON WEED marries IttfcjfANDLE. They go on .honeymoon. PEARL’S fath Two other characters _ 2CTIVE GUMSHOE and fcwMfet' ?o one knows exactly what the .•esctiirg Jimp and Pearl today. ’ » * tf. ‘Thai .!y ; assed and r?passed her, site i yarked off the apon strings. There she tied together. Soon he had a King r p<. dangling to ward the earth. The lovely bride and hnr silly husband slid down this rone and were upon terra firma once more. So there! Nothing is impo f.ible these day:- and times. Tore the author pauses to writ-) a note to the pipe shop in Annis ton, Ala. "Dear Bill: If you are looking for a good a I tong boy to work in your pipe shop, you must look elsewhere, This author is still an. author.” * s U y\ The following day .limp and Pearl were up bright and daily, tt’ght after breakfast they chased over to the drug atom to bay some postcard.-. Jimp sent one to Pearl’s fath er, saying, “Having a fine time. Glad you are not here." This dons the sillly young hus band and hi-: sensible young wife deemed it time to start for the North pole. Their private ah plane xrc.: sum m ned. Pearl started to climb aboard, "Wait!" cried Jimp. “Wait for what ?’’ asked hi:; adorable bride. Jimp ruui thought or nomethtng. He remembered the last time they limbed into the plane- and dis covered they couldn't rit down of. ter riding upon the -donkeys. "dry sitting; upon the grbur.d suggested he. Pcari :-nt up *;i the ground. Jimp rat upon the gvottnd. It sal very well. Sa they bearded the plane. ‘■'North Pole, ' raid Jimp to the | chauffer. “Yes, sir,” said the chauffer. •North Pole, sir.” Away they flew. It wr.s afternoon. The plane was flybvg low over Canada. “Another plane on the starboard side sir.’’ shouted the chauffer over his shoulder. S Jimp got out his glasses. He | gave Pearl a short drink r.rij took lone himself. "Whr.t did you ray?” he asked i the chauffer. “Another plane on the starboard side, or maybe it’s the portable, sir,’’ called the chauffer. Yes, there was the plane. It was growing larger every mom ent. Before long it was full grown. 'Jimp could make out a sign on i its side which read, “North Pole Special.” “It’s going to the North Pole, too, shouted Jimp. “Yes, sir,” replied the chauffer. "The place is very popular this summer. We’ll speed up and get there first.” The race was a lively one, but gradually Jimp’s plane drew away from the North Pole Special. About four o’clock the pole was sighted. The plane circled and landed. ‘‘That’ll be nil for today.” said Jimp as he and his sweet young wife got out. “Call for us early tomorrow.” The plane circled and flew away. Jimp and Pearl looked about them. The only person in sight was an Eskimo sitting on top of the North Pole eating blubber. Before they could speak to him, the North Pole Special arriv ed. Three passengers hepped out. The Eskimo hopped in and away it flew. • “Let’s look a* the new arrivals,’ suggested Pearl. Drawirrr closer^' the young cou ple were flabbergasted. Who, among all persons, should they meet at the North Pole hut Mr. Handle, Detective and Mrs. Gum shoe. Without wasting any time, Pearl's old man started in to rave. “You young scoundrel,” rav ed he. “What did you mean by kicking me into the Grand Can yon?’’ “I didn't mean for you to land upon your head and be uninjured,’ said Jimp calmly, casting his eye about for a weapon. He saw the North Pole was too large to han dle. “I wish I had my gun with me,” cried. Handle. “You haven’t your gun?’’ said Jimp And saying which he took out after Pearl's father. Round and round the north pole they went getting hotter and hotter all the time. Before anyone realized what was happening, they got so hot they melted the ice. All five fell into the water. The North Pole went down. And the chapter ended, leaving them swimming about. (To be continued) For economical transportation buy a Chevrolet—So Smooth So ’ Powerful Jordan Chevrolet com. pany. No. 1 Township News of interest (Special to The Biar.t The small child of Mr. Denton Humphries was buried ut Camp ! Creel; last Wednesday afternoon. The cause of its death was pneu monia. Its mcther was buried about three months ago. It is sur vived by ivS father and one sister. Mr. and Mrs. Barney Conner. Misses Lola and Nellie Connor of the Ora mill spent the Week end at Mr. Thamer Humphries. Mr. and Mrs. Lonzte Scruggs of A ••'oi’dale spent the weekend with Mr. and Mrs. Irvin Scruggs. Messrs. Loyd Humphries and Col lis Karls are attending high school at Cliffside. Mr. Robert Jolley visited his par ents Mr. arid Mrs. Noah Jolley on Sunday. Miss Willie Humphries of Gras Pond spent, the week cm] with Miss Vernie Byars. A large number Of our people af - ♦coded the singing at Jit. Pleasant lart Sunday. Miss Rdisto Bailey is suffering from a case of poisoning. Mrs. John Greene at 1 children of Boding Springs visited relatives here last week. Heme Coming* At Oak Grove Church (Special to The S ar.) The members present at Oak Grove Baptist church near Kins;.! Mountain decided on last Sunday to .sit apart the fourth Sunday in Sep t'i rpher os ‘'hem;' coming” and dol lar day. All member.', former mem bers and friends arc requested l> be present at this date. Since last year -.as a “short crop year” some members failed to meet their pledges or. ‘ho near ehPrvh builuirg. This leaves us be hind in our regular payments. Therefore we hrne that all, wheth er they have made! a pledge or not; will give at least one dollar, over and above any pledges ..hey have j made. Wt! would like to get. enough • money to pay our dues up to this time. Any \vh.> cannot attend this service and wish to contribute any | thing to this fund can send their gift to the secretary and treasurer, of the building committee, James S. Ware, Kiag.s Mountain, N. C. route 4. Closed car Sue says that her motto i3t “Cry and Get It.” NOTICE Notice is hereby given that the firm heretofore doing business un der the name of McLean and Bur roughs or the Shelby Sausage Co., has been dissolved. This the 1HHi day of September 1926. EARL I). McLEAN. J. T. BURROUGHS. FOR AMBULANCE SERVICE CALL 61. PALMER’S FUNERAL HOME 109 West Sumter St. Gastonia Mystery Of Charlotte Girl? Cast.' nia. Sept. 14.—The mystery of the baby found in Bill McArv er’s flivver here last week has beer partially solved. Welfare officials have learned i hat a woman with u baby of about the same aero as the one fount abandoned in McArver’s car fled | from the American Rescue home at, Charlotte last Wednesday night, an,! was reported to have been in Glister in Friday, -fcocal officers ex press the belief that she found out she could not travel with the child, and left ir in the McArver car in hope that it would be taken to a good home. The baby is being kept at the Gaston sanitarium until a home is found for it. No s<.eps have been la!;' : to apprehend the mother. Apes Descended From Msbn, Not Man From Apes J! riin. The tipn is descended from man s.nil not mail from the ape., aci ardin;;: to Professor Max West*': hb.fer, uis.odian of the piifhol .giral museum of the Berlin , university. if: point, out that chain pan see cubs resemble human l being.; much more tha: do ihoir parents. lie says that erv .a,n hu i .m inner prgr.nn evidence that man’s ancestors lived far a time in water. These peculiar charac. 1 "ri-ti"-r are missing in apes which he declares ‘'shows that ape rc priser.tr: the subsepuenf develop ment and proves that man is the elder form of manail.’’ Prsf. Wcstcihofev elucidated this Theory before the anthropol ogical congress now at session in SaLsburm Is :t no* i' great re'iie’’ t > h ue son eo’ic. siieii a - Old Santa, drive up and r.ot try to rcl! you an - i hrng ? DREADFUL PAINS Georgia Lady, Who Had Lost Too Much Weight, Was Advised to Take Cardui and Is « Now Well. . Columbus, Ga.—Mrs. George S. Hunter, of this city, writes: “After I married, thirteen months Ugp, I suffered with dreadful pains ftaj, my sides during ... My side l)>*rt so bad It nearly killed me. I i Md to go to bed and stay some ©thes two weeks at a time. I could not work and I just dragged around the house. • “I got very thin—I went from 126 pounds down to less than 100. My mother had long been a user of Cardui and she knew what a good medicine it was for this trouble, so Pp told me to get some and take it, sent to the store after it and be fore 1 had taken tho first bottle I began to Improve. My side hurt less and I began to Improve in health. ... The Cardui acted as a fine tonic and I do not feci like the same person. I am eo much better. I am well now. I have gained ten pounds and ana still gaining. Mysides do not trouble me at ail. “I wish every suffering woman knew aDout Cardui.” NC-160 I Profit Recently a customer made a test of Tux edo Hog Ration and Corn on three pigs. Here arc his figures from weaning to dressing time. Cost of 3 pigs (weight about 30 lbs.) $18.00 12 sacks Tusctft Hog Ration, at $2.90 34.80 7 bushels oorit st 75c 5.2S 9 bushel* cant at 65c 5.85 Total cost of pigs and feed $63.90 The hogs were killed and dressed at ex actly 6 months and weighed 767 lbs. Weight of hogs on foot at butchering time —945 lbs. Received for hogs on foot 11 l^c per lb. pr $108.67. Profit on investment of $63.90 v. as $44.77 or 70%, There’s no reason why you shouldn’t feed Tuxedo. We recommend it. Hunt and Hewitt Lattimore, N. C. Tuxedo Hog Ration j Ce-re-a-lia Sweets Tuxedo Dairy Tuxedo Hog Ration Tuxedo Chop Tuxedo Chick Tuxedo Starter Tuxedo Buttermilk Growing Mash Tuxedo Developer Tuxedo Eggmash Tuxedo Scratch Tuxedo Poultry r ———————— -~-- . N> SHE’LL DO DEATH DEFYING STUNTS AT FAIR / Besides wnrs and rumors of wars Americnn obtains her mo.^t daring1 and sensational circus acts from Europe and Mile. Florentine is the sensational importation of present year. She will be seen twice daily in her death-defying aerial act twice daily at ihe Olcvcalrd county fair this year, to be held September 27-Oct. 2. Mile. Florentine is the featured free act of the Nat Reiss shows, engaged for the midway by Sec retary J. S. Dorten and her act will be in addition to the headliners that will appear in the greatest free act program ever presented at a Cleveland county fair, m a I AT 1 FANNING’S For Your Old Straw Hat aril SATURDAY The Last Day of our Three Day Offer Bring Your Old Straw And We Will Allow You One Dollar In Exchange FOR A NEW FALL Stetson or Dunlap -ALL THE NEW SHADES AND SHAPES W. L FANNING & CO.