Newspapers / The Lash (Moravian Falls, … / Jan. 1, 1913, edition 1 / Page 2
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' V i, i Itllzj Ilia it put!i;ied In toy lansua.1 1 15 CLztzj tunia docilcbusa from thr pulpit m J 3 izzltzziizrjs It craata the dictionary :SatGt SUBSCMPtXON OwitYiuk;- r 5C -i V 4 There's a taarsiHcent rkce of fiuttanitr forrasr- a , ' - ; t iuiAi miu ut 'iiJuil It cuts, atoots, and Yt&xnct raa-. IZsr-rfcat Feu K. C TWO'SCBSCMPTIOKS ONB YlUJuV AOC II v form of A. IT Orlffln l. " f , 4 - , VFXV fetriBSCRiPTIOifOHR YkaA.-.6oc II Pernaps;the Lord mt'the tWnkerW tht,V; .V ': 'hM " -seethatockyMottntgoatWb IV' ;lV'tf - - 11 -?T- Patent or torenting a cigarette holder andV, . - t . 4VVf.A 73Wh'casecomblnd.:.--' .'V:, 'i 'V?' LZCNARD B, LAWS. Editor & PublUher. Itered & aecond-claia matter fetfc 19X0, at KoraTlan Falla, N. C: ; , V , - . h ' It meota tie world without a ilgh. ' It toowa no human fear,;!, - It wages war on all unjust, vV Though many a foe la near h , . ' What a boon to hnmanity. That inventire jbuira' per for every state by routs and railroad divisions oul'd wave" his ears and hray, forth the hellish ; rV ani ThMca .lmnct rinnhv ' ' j horroTliis inveutiofa. invites v : " - A, 1 whatit has always bee before Now:theonly way K :h? thoroughly; studies the itchi verm, ; " r lean beet this ekra expense to raise the priced ybe'J can;erecfc a scotching post8rid get'.-. , ot me Juasn two cents eacu yeany soscnpuua. jnow umraaes ana rienasyoa want to see we ; 0. fC - Howdy doo, bow does your New ' 1 Year pledge come tatit ,U t r into the big tent, very Doayi - ine J Lash is getttn tteady toerform. The political cyclone has passed. Rope in the rascals and,watch another performanccn paper! still come whistling up to your mail box to tell yon how the boys down the farm are gettin' on, besides we love to visit you, So I am going to aslc eyery reader who wants ' this . little visitor to grow J bigger and better to tell me sa by sending in a club before next issue.. The engravers are making cartoons for the 5 February? edition which will be a hot baby. . Write me a personal letter, I loVe to hear from you. So remember me boys. What of the stars and bars, do they realy repre sent the things they were desisted for? Bosh! another patent. ..With his "double barreled 'devil- K gun 'a young man can be. transformed inioa physical wreck and started on 'the roa1 to v crime : ; much quicker than smoking cigarettesthe old wayi r , The neVK invention will educate boys1 for pick-; pockets' and " gamblersV thieves, dirunkards Jand" -toughs,sconvicts and sluggards bar tenders ! and j . rougns. w ; N rV;il'J Haviyoua seed wart or an old bunion that you want patented? 1 Wonder. who holds.the patent ' ' on suicide? ? It mst be 4a first cousin to Mr Grifflnf Z If cigarette conveniences are gom' to be patented , , it seems nigger bawdy houses should be chartered i - - - - -t '.Vf--5- & '; -!- beg your parsnips Mr. Ladies, but I . wouldn't be a suffragette if I could.'aud couldnt if I would. old prostrate American Eaglel Your wings crappea, tall teatners yansea out ana every marx of former pride gone. 1 I betieve money can make a bigger fool than the Lord can. Seen anything of old Miss Demrjcracy?--the old nnzzy has killed the elephant sho's you born. ADout tae oruv tune a teiiow can i pui on am is when he wants to puke. A puke is a neat name for a human didapper who can swap ends politically so fast his pistol pockets are on his boot legs half the time. ' An old swivel-eyed bachelor with a head like a seed wart alwayseminds me of a bottle of ginger p that h stoo over iniglit wtth th'e'stopper pulled out U the world loved God as much as it fears the dheh Wdld'soon tncker put , tt&tga that are allera goin' tp happen never do happen. Mr. Brag, take notice. 'idyoueyerhear a girls talk of things almost ; brealdn bjerjjjiart the :iieart is mbotst the toughest piece of meat in the whole critter. - Why should the trusts care which party does the . skinning so they get the hides and tallow? A good reliable set of "bowels- would-be worth 0 more to some men than any quantity of brains. : m ' ' , Fine duds ' are now worshiped more thah the Lord is. Woodrow may be in dead earnest and no doubt is, but the job of reforming those tit-pullin' greasy -' tools for the trusts in his orn party will give him S a doublejuick shuffle for 4 while. , v. A few snackerjipes and jack-ass snipes will be playing Major Hemphill soonasking for a demo cratic slice of pie after they find they couldn't stink the party to death. ' A gang of millionaires making laws to prosecute a gang of millionaires, n Remarkable; isn't it? If it's right for half of the' world .to live idle and own move than they need while the other half rages lise a turK without enough to eat or wear, then I'll swap my Bible for a checker-board. 7 nui a um at reuun usuwv uiu muttsutoi . , oonortunitiea are the same for the rich and the . Vnen tile ypui poor alike, I reccommend that said fellow have his more of craftiheai, it may probably be - head screwed up in a vise? and given the gimlet mu-uuu , auuw degree-bored for the simples. on PKticaI rehgiduslobsters. m , m , , m . It is' going to sound the alantfand if - tiie people ' , . . u-j'ri"J'''4.tT. . refuse to wake up; In Uncle Sam, I ain't advisin' you. but if I had on , . , .. . r . . . , . . . , labor's glimmering hope, they must aoon dance to ;.7HT 7 i7 ZrZ , " the music of tyrants and hnsUefor their hash. I'd see to it that old, Widow Mexico sorter sun- , . .n i TTZL mereddownorl'ddoubie the; famous old harpy over alasses barrel and beat off her patent-leather bustle with a bung-staster. And gathered waists are fn style again this year. They are gathered pretty, much the same way as they were last year. Young . men, gather them - gently, and not swoop onto .'em . like' a hungry " hawk on a green garfsling, pr like rpping a three year old heuW. Gather 'em easy as you would a ' poke of hen eggs, - ji i l j..t.t. Mn. ' . , - is a magnificent assortment of, thunder: ahead toe ? Dives, if Laxarus be left much longer to; care lor the dogs. , We have studied, the working man' in . his comings and his gous.. his hopes and his fears, his struggles and his disappointments,' and ' the last resort from his oppression is one thai , is -ever found irrepairable.'"' 'C : t " "yr . ' Friends, Comrades a dd everybody , I ant much in love with you all for helping me to circulate my.-.';- ten-cent missionary, and I only "wish?' I 'pbssessedtf sumcieni loaves m uuc yj uoc juy uu uuve I F. S. And don't let ypuroutb getj loose from with me and stick vbur feet underlrfTrlittie table. ye during Uie performance and make a noise like ; but this .being; impossible my ocd .wishes mast i cowpulluV her foot out.of mtxdhple.V gradually ooze out through e mUe'mbntaly - . ? - . t'.l . .J. : I ." "to-? V4 'l . hakehan.witHyo printer'. HS 'vs "-srv-to 4?r-,y 'r'5-3 1
The Lash (Moravian Falls, N.C.)
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
Jan. 1, 1913, edition 1
2
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