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Page 4 The Blue Banner October26,2000 Perspectives Is democracy just too confusing? Shaun Cashman Columnist while doing some contract work for A-B Tech recently, I had the honor of editing together a video promo for the upcoming Educa tion Bill. It really made me think about our whole screwed-up voting system. One of the last titles I made in the video says, “Vote on November 7th.” I felt so hypocritical saying that. Here I am, making a video to convince people to vote for a bill that would give the university sys tem more money when I have not in my entire life ever gone to vote. And then I thought, “Why have I never voted?” I’ve had plenty of opportunities. I even registered when I turned 18. And what with the new no-excuse policy that allows me to vote any time between Oct. 16 and Nov. 7, I can’t say I’m too busy anymore. Now, I like to consider myself an intelligent individual, so not voting must be a conscious choice. Sure, laziness and lack of interest plays a part, but there has to be more to it. After all, voting is one of our most prized rights as citizens. We choose our leaders, right? Birthright, luck, age or money has nothing to do with it anymore... or does it? Who can afford to run for govern ment? It takes a lot of money to get your face plastered before hundreds of thousands of non-voting Ameri cans. Ever notice how 99 percent of the people running for government are usually rich lawyers? Sure, an odd pro-wrestler or two can get elected on sheer name rec ognition, but most major politi cians are bred in fancy upper-class hatcheries in Texas. And under pro tective lighting, our young politi cians are trained for their future careers as big-mouthed slackers. Rejects become school board lead ers. But, to get to the point, the num ber of people who can actually run for government is a lot smaller than we would like to admit. Got to keep out the riffraff after all. We can’t have any sex offenders or drug ad dicts getting into positions of power. That would be foolish. And to make it even harder to run for office, we have a rw’o party sys tem with little or no chance of a third party ever winning an elec tion. There are j ust way too many people who vote a straight parry ticket because they actually believe that Democrats and Republicans are different. But we’ll let those people remain in their happy little fanta sies. I wouldn’t want to break anyone’s bubble. As such, bitterness towards our current party system plays a small part in my not voting. But if all the nonvoting people like me went to the polls, our votes would indeed make a difference, so still there has to be more. So, would electing a third party candidate really change anything? No. Why? Because we live under a bureaucracy, and anyone who has ever worked in one knows that the essence of a bureaucracy is to never get anything done. Paper work, legal bribery, media manipulation and inner-party squabbles have made sure that our government only does something when alien invaders blow up half a state. But even then, it has to be an important state. After all, the Brit ish invaded and destroyed Mon tana years ago and no one noticed. So we have a small group of law yers running for offices and then doing very little when they actually get into them aside from bleeding us dry for “senatorial benefits. ” And you want me to be part of this process? And how much is the popular vote really worth? In the vague re cesses of my mind are memories from middle school and of some thing called the Electoral College. Aren’t they ones who really make the voting decisions? And don’t they base their choices on the Re publican/Democratic registry in specified counties in upstate New York? Do I even make a difference? I’ve heard some say yes and some say no. Who am I to believe? Who can I trust? Can I listen to the politi cians? What was that about “No new taxes,” or “I did not have sexual relations with that woman?” How about this whole thing on term limits, and didn’t somebody say they’d legalize pot or praying in schools or something? I personally believe we vote for whoever has the funniest voice so we can make fun of them. Nowa days, if a child says, “I want to be the President when I grow up,” we quickly rush him to a psychiatrist. But ignoring my pessimistic and cynical view of our current policy leaders, voting should still be my civic duty and pride, right? Who cares if I have no knowledge of any of the candidates or their platforms? Why should it bother me that the popular vote doesn’t mean any thing? So you’re telling me that all I have to do is flip this small switch for some annoying candidate, and not only do I get a new leader bent on economically ravaging the middle- class, but I also get signed up for jury duty. Cool. What a great privi lege. It would be un-American to think otherwise. Have I confused you yet? If not, please read paragraph two, section three again, but this time, ignore any reference to “small-beaked- chipmunk-cooker. ” To conclude, I don’t vote because I simply could care less who wins and I find the whole process terri bly confusing and pointless. Those in charge, whether Republican, Democratic or other, will continue to run things the same way. Taxes and inflation will steadily increase, our environment will go to crap and with any luck I’ll prob ably be drafted in the next war, which will conveniently occur right after that whole pygmy-sex-slave scandal thing in the White House. Oh well, time to go support this great country of ours with 30 per cent of my wages. Addressing mid-semester problems Jason Allen Columnist As the midpoint of the semester flies past us, there are issues that simply need to be discussed. First, I wonder about the new eating establishment on campus. Now, as a carnivore, I find the idea of having a place that specializes in meat (namely chicken) within walk ing distance very appealing. But the thing I don’t get is the fact that we have a high vegetarian popu lace around here. What about them? Sure, they can eat fries, but it seems that even the salads there have sliced, grilled chicken in them. I’m sur prised they haven’t started a peti tion or a protest yet. I know this one is a little late, but what about Coming Out Day? Does everyone have a holiday now? I’m not gay, but I feel, as a liberal- minded individual, that they de serve a month like African Ameri cans and women. By the way, can we have a We Love Jason Allen Day? You know, where everyone wears little buttons proclaiming their love for their fa vorite columnist. That could be neat. Everyone eats a three-meat- minimum pizza, drinks a Sun Drop soda and watches at least one hour of cartoons or WWF wrestling. Then they all sit around the Jason Allen Day tree, sing songs and ex change presents. Next is the sudden shift of sea sonal events in the retail world. Now, call me crazy, but I thought the order of events for the fall and winter was Halloween, Thanksgiv ing and then Christmas. I know that some places kind of gloss over Halloween because of the stigma attached to it, but wouldn’t that mean that the next logical holiday would be Thanksgiving? If that is correct, then how come department stores are already put ting up Christmas trees and wreaths? I remember the Christmas shop ping season used to start the day after Thanksgiving, not the day af ter the Fourth of July. Speaking of order, the weather is out of control. First, it gets cold enough to snow around the begin ning of the month and now we are back to early summer temperatures. I’m not complaining about it, but the sudden shifts in the tempera ture drive some of us crazy as out bodies scramble to keep up with the changes. I know it can’t be Mother Nature’s fault, so I’m going to blame the atmospheric science students. Oh, come on, we all know they have special magical powers to mess the weather up just by predicting it. One will make a prediction, the weather does som.ething else, then another one of them makes a pre diction and so on. If they ever all agree on some thing, all weather will cease to exist and the world will come to an end, so there’s never a happy medium. Oh, well. It seems that the departments could use a happy medium to re solve these funding fights. I got in an argument with an athlete who will remain nameless about fund ing for departments. This individual was very knowledgeable about eco nomics, and gave me a run for my money, so to speak. He said that I had no room to talk about the athletic department’s funding when my department, the drama department, also had a huge budget. “But at least our USITT (United States Institute of Theatre Tech nology) team that goes to national competition has won two national championships in the four or so years they’ve been around,” I said. “What about you guys?” In the end, I didn’t win the argu ment, but that shut him up for a few minutes. Oh, you can support our national champs by coming to the Haunted Theatre at Carol Belk Theatre and get some well-needed scares for a few bucks. The money helps to send our team to competi tion, so watch for fliers and posters for the dates and times. Speaking of theater. I’m going to use a spot here to plug my latest endeavor. Oct. 30 and 31 from 4:30 to 7 p.m. in Carmichael 208 will be the auditions for my show of the season. The show is an adapta tion of Jim Henson’s “Labyrinth.” That’s right, you heard me cor rectly. The auditions are open to all stu dents, faculty and staff, and no pre vious experience is necessary. Some come on out and support me in my work. So, anyhow, I want you all to go out there this week or the next and just look for something that just seems wrong. Just find it, wonder about it and then have a good laugh at the silliness of life. The Blue taer welcomes letters and comments regarding the content or quality of this publication. Letters should should not exceed 300 words. Letters for publication must also Include the author’s signature, class standing and major or other rjelatlonship to uncn. nil submissions are subject to editing for length and content The deadline for Letters to the Editor is noon on Tuesday. Please send letters to: The Blue Bduner, Karpen Hall 244, One University Heights, flshevllle, I1.C. 28804, submit a letter via the Blue Banner Online, or e-mail banner@unca.edu. Guns as tools: NR A and butcher knives Josh Day Columnist What would the NRA do without their butcher knives? Laws fixing the gun-show loop hole and banning assault weapons would have been passed years ago if it weren’t for the overwhelming NRA influence in Congress. An Aryan Nations lunatic can shoot up a daycare center and Congress has the audacity to compare his submachine gun to a butcher knife. Yes, Buford O. Furrow, Jr.’s guns and bulletproof vest were all legally purchased. Let’s face it. If America didn’t have such easy access to guns, the murder rate would drop signifi cantly. In Britain, private citizens cannot own handguns. A total of twelve people died from gun crimes in 1999. You know how many people died in the U.S.? About 16,000. And the NRA tells us it ain’t the guns. This issue has been on people’s minds ever since Columbine. In case you’ve forgotten the weapons used in this particular gun massa cre, let me refresh your memory. A pair of old shotguns were used, the all-American home-defense gun. With the barrels sawed off, the spray of pellets covers a much wider area — horrible for duck hunting, but ideal for close quarter work. Also used in the attack was a semi automatic Hi Point Rifle (9mm). According to the Ohio manufac turer who created this weapon, this gun was designed for the average working man. Wal-Mart sells 9mm ammunition. Intratec TEC DC semi-automatic pistol (9mm), a now illegal hand gun that was originally designed as a “peace keeper” for the white South African government, was employed as well. When it was still legally being manufactured (in the Reagan years before John Hinckley tried to impress Jodie Foster) the TEC-9 was once advertised as the most popular crime gun in America. If it weren’t for Clinton getting the ban passed the NRA-owned congress, this gun would still be manufactured and sold at gun shops around the country. Of course this “ban” means little to nothing because owners of the gun can still sell to anyone they please. In fact, you can go to a gun show and find guns sold in bulk quantities alongside other semi-il- legal weapons like rocket launchers and submachine guns. The NRA has us believing most guns used in crimes are stolen. That’ s true, only if you include all crimes — armed robbery, kidnap ping and rape - where a gun is only present, not fired. These crimes make up the bulk of criminal activ ity in the country. But ifyou look at crimes like mass murder, non-gang related homi cide and hate crimes, the guns are most often legally purchased, usu ally at a gun show. The Columbine guns were legally purchased, as were nearly all of the weapons used in school shootings and other mass murders. You could hop on the interstate one weekend, drive to the nearest gun show, pick up a fully auto matic M-11 machine gun and mow down dozens of people by Mon day. Meanwhile, the NRA is talk ing about butcher knives. After all, a firearm, no matter how wickedly designed, is merely a tool. It’s an inanimate object. Guns don’t kill people, people kill people, right? Despite it being created to kill and thus being a tool of indisput able evil, it remains just a tool, according to the NRA. So what’s to be done? Close the gun shop loophole? Ban assault weapons (seriously this time)? Im pose child safety locks? Prosecute parents? Require registration on all handguns currently owned and purchased? Ban handguns? Ban all guns? First of all, the child safety lock law is nonsense. It’s only on the discussion table because Democrats are trying to please dumb gun con trol advocates who don’t know any better. Look at Al Gore’s crusade to ban the Saturday Night Special, for instance. If you’re keeping a loaded gun for defense, it some what ruins the purpose of a fast retrieval when you have punch in a four-code combination which you could easily forget in the heat of the moment. Yes, the availability of guns is the largest contributing factor to America’s outrageous murder count. Yes, a lot of innocent people have to die to preserve our right to bear arms. This is America. “We’re armed, and we like to shoot,” as Roger & Me creator Michael Moore once aptly put. With all the armed citizens in this country, it’s a miracle we don’t have bullets flying over our head whenever we walk outside. We are a violent culture because of guns, and we have to either accept that fact or do something about the influence of the NRA in our government. In the meantime, please stop the nonsense. It insults all of us. Sena tor Orrin Hatch, when you com pare an M-16 assault rifle to a garden-variety kitchen knife. Asheville North Carolina Employment Hotline: 828-255-1144 Visit the Biltmore Estate Web site at www.biltmore.com for Estate information and links to our job postings. SU jihat t le Qi jays V VaJ th to (>ron( fether isenti tunti JThe fence, feed/ Lofol Ijingf Iflucat Wtun rit is tntati Watth Iryar I me ti w we asco )rtra; )r the The 1 le pe )lkm meri iclud )ng. uditc uarte i4ille Jfon min •» lili, lot t rist ItaffV Loca lersh fiallei |.m. t HLilie; ygs, 1 ion o tn th ejnoti' ■tpres Wtire Wokee in full I The ltd,b fry ki lot sa Jgs, b Ifcem wpre 111 Sr I ajor 113osti • ere t Sid tc |l cent |lase.; M asy hnga ^e p;
University of North Carolina at Asheville Student Newspaper
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Oct. 26, 2000, edition 1
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