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Page 8 THE LAST FRONTIER The Clarion \ Sept. 17,2010 Your Horoecope: Delivered by your astrologically inclined Editor In Chief: John M. Climer Aries (March 21-April 19): Sometimes you have to make the first move to get what you want. Lucly Color: Greenish Blue Taurus (April 20-i^1ay20): It’s better to know little about a lot, than a lot about little. Lucky Color: Hunter Green Gemini (i^lay 21-June 20): If you Still haven’t spoken to that person you’ve thought was cute for the last year, now’s the time to go for it. Lucky Color: Valentine Pink Cancer (June 21-Juiy 22): Reaching for the stars typically yields enlightenment whereas staring at the sun will likely result in blindness. Lucky Color: Blind Spot Purple Leo (July 23-August 22): While attempting to hone your culinary skills, you’ll discover what Snoop Dogg meant when he said, "drop it like it’s hot." Lucky Color: Blister Yellow Virgo (August 23 - September 22): A conflict of interest will prevent you from pursuing a possible romantic interest. Irony is interesting. Lucky Color: Frustration Maroon Libra (September 23 - October 23): Attempting to lose those pesky last five pounds will be temporarily halted when you get injured running, while attempting to lose those pesky last five pounds. Karma is fickle. Lucky Color: Pavement Black Scorpio (October 23 - November 21): Keep an umbrella handy It’s about to pour Lucky Color: Lightening Blue Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21): Keeping up with things is easier than catching up to them. Lucky Color: Endurance Red Capricorn (December 22 - January 20): The smallest nicety can make the biggest difference in a person’s day Lucky Color: Courtesy Cerulean Aquarius (January 21 - February 19): Break free from your usual routine: wake up before lunch. Lucky Color: Sunrise Orange Pisces (February 20 - March 20): Much like the recently re-paved Ingles parking lot, you’ll squeal when car tires roll over you. Lucky Color: Hospital White flCNOrTHI TIMES By Daniel Heyman and David Alexander Managing Editor and Copy Editor hooking anytime THIS 15 A NO HOOKING Z01ME-YOU ARE FitCOA&ED AND liVILLBE AEPOftTED.YOUR VEHICLE CAM BETAKEN AWAY. I I'l' ' 11 ^ I I I 11 ‘ b ^~ In the tradition of “Tosh .0,” we came up with the following one-liners to accompany this week’s Sign of the Times: >Do you get a ticket for loitering if you’re just waiting in line? >Do you rent the van by the hour too? >Does the van play Roxanne instead of the ice-cream truck song? >Is he the fourth guy that day!? >Doing donuts in that van probably costs extra. >I thought mini-vans smelled bad after soccer practice. >Something tells me the shocks aren’t the most beat up thing in that van. AmE;^ICAN HE/^0 1 ,eliman.com ^ HEISMAN HEt TROPHY ^ TRi „4 , -ii/ ^ ^ _ We at The Clarion can't decide if Reggie Bush, this week's American Hero, deserves acclaim or criticism; so we leave it for you to decide. On one hand, he apologetically admitted to violating NCAA regulations by accepting gifts from sports marketers while still being a collegiate athlete and returned the Heisman Trophy up-front and without contest. On the other hand, he completely screwed over the school where he began his career as a football superstar. Now, due to his actions, the University of Southern California faces the suspension of 30 scholarships for three years, a two year bowl game ban and a four year probationary period. WANTED Staff members to write, report, photo graph, draw, edit, and sell advertise ments for the student newspaper. The Clarion needs your help! As a volunteer staff member, you can • earn academic credit in COM 106 • know about "stuff' before everyone else does • get a cool T-shirt for a job well done • reap financial rewards for serving Brevard College Staff meetings are open to all Fridays at 11:30 a.m. in IVI-G 102
Brevard College Student Newspaper
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