Newspapers / The Pinehurst Outlook (Pinehurst, … / Dec. 15, 1899, edition 1 / Page 6
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THE PINE HURST OUTLOOK. The I. uli on Hie Kaiser. Here is another good story they are telliug in Europe about the German Emperor: The Kaiser, at a recent re view in Berlin, reprimanded old General von Meerseheidt for losing his presence of mind at a critical moment. "If Your Majesty thinks th;it I am getting too old, I he of you to allow me to resign." No, no," replied the Kaiser, "you are too young to resign. Indeed, if your Mood didn't course through your veins quite so fast, you would be a more useful army leader." On the evening of that day the Kaiser and the General met at a court ball. The General was talking to some young ladies. "Ah, Meerseheidt," cried William, "that is right, get ready to marry. Take a young wife, thenth.it excitable temper ament of yours will soon vanish." The General bowed low as he retorted, "I beg be excused, Your Majesty! A young wife and a young Emperor would be more than I could possibly stand!" Exchange .Miniature Locomotive. One of the smallest locomotives ever built in this country has been constructed by George William Titcomb, station agent at Saco. The engine is 26 inches in length, and is as perfect in every detail as any locomotive ever turned out, al though it runs on a track the guage of which is less than four inches. The tender is complete, although the tank will hold but a few quarts of water and the amount of coal that it will hold is but a few pounds. The interior of the cab contains a steam guage, throttle, reverse lever, whistle lever, and all other appurte nances. The seats of the engineer and and fireman are cushioned. When steamed up the locomotive runs over the rails as smoothly as the biggest engine and could haul several cars a number of miles if a fireman small enough to get into the cab could be found to keep up steam. Bangor (Me.) Commercial. Tlie ltue That Failed. The Indians had bound their captive to the stake, when the conventional happy thought struck the latter. "If you burn me," he explained, "the sun will be darkened tomorrow." "You will find," replied the Indian, "if you calculate the parallax to the forty-third decinnl place, that the eclipse does not take place until the day after tomorrow." Saying which, for these simple children of the forest were all graduates of the government schools, they proceeded with their bar baric slaughter. Detroit Journal. Ills Own Error. "Did you ever make a serious mistake in a prescription?" "Never but once," answered the drug clerk, as a gloomy look passed over his face. "I charged a man 30 cents for a prescription instead of 35." Washington Star. Customer "What is the price of this calico?" Salesman "Sixteen cents yard." Customer "Sixteen cents? I'l give you fifteen." Salesman "You mis understand me. I said six cents, not sixteen." Customer "Six cents a yard? I I'm! I'll give you five." Boston Tran script. PUNGENCIES. "The man I marry," said she, with a stamp, "must be a hero!" "He will be," remarked the cautious bachelor. Ex change. Artistic Knowledge. The Dilettante: "You ought to see Mrs. lhompson s magnificent home! It s just full ot Corots and Millets. ine rarvenu: "Terrible! Whv doesn't she try insect powder?" Selected. Children's Queer Sayings. Tom was present when Ins aunt, speaking or rennyson's death, said, "After all, he was an old mm : it was time for him to be in Abraham's bosom." "Abraham s bosom must be neuilv full now," said loin. "Perhaps he will have to go into I saac's. " Excha ng c A city young lady was spending her summer vacation in the country. "Uncle Ilasmus," she said one day, "is that chicken standing bv the gate a Brahmin?" "Xo," said the old farmer, "that is a Leghorn." "How simple of me!" said the city young lady. "I might hive known that myself! lean see the horns on his ankles now!" Exchange. One part of an elevator-boy's duty is to answer questions, but not even an elevator-boy can be expected to know everything. A guest at one of the big hotels, while going down in the elevator, remarked to the colored elevator-man, "I want to go to the wharf where the tea was thrown overboard." "Well," said the man, looking mystified, "you'd bet ter inquire at the office. I reckon that was before I came here: I've only been in Boston about a year." Boston Transcript. Any Old Lock. Since Paderewski's marriage the story is being revived of a well-known society woman, who wrote to him for "a lock of hair." She received this reply: "Dear Madame, M. Pad erewski directs me to sav that it affords him much pleasure to comply with your request. You failed to specify whose hair you desire. So he sends samples of that of his valet, cook, waiter, and mat tress belonging to M. Pullman, pro prietor of the coach in which he travelled in America." Public Opinion. A Struggle for Consistency. Prince Henry of Orleans lias a pleasant system of literary work. When he travels, he takes with him a corps of talented men, including a physician, a scientist, an editor, an historian, and a photographer, each of whom makes a daily contribution to the book which is to describe the journey. In describing this method at a Paris salon, a friend ironically asked, "And what is the hard work which you do for your book?" "The hardest of all," said the prince. "I have the over whelming duty of making the various accounts agree." Exchange. Conceit. He was an earnest minister, and one Sunday, in the course of a sermon on the significance of little things, lie said : "The hand which made the mighty heavens made a strain of sand; which made the lofty mountains made a drop of water; which made you made the grass of the field; which made me made daisy !' Chicago Journal. .The Pine Grove House. PINEHURST, N. C. be open with home com- vv forts such as New England, ers like, for a limited number of people who are obliged by health or inclination to leave their homes for a salubrious climate such as Pineiiuust, N. C, can claim. For such, I. A. FLINT, of the Stone Farm House, IS. Ueai ixg, Mass., (known as a pleasant, place to board during the heated term) will be at the Pine Grove House, to welcome. TERMS, $8.00 TO $12.00 PER WEEK. DEPARTMENT STORE, PINEHURST, N. C. DEPT. A Drugs ami l'ropiietary Medicines. B Dry Goods and Notions. C Gents' Furnishings, Hats and Caps. D Boots, Shoes and Rubber Goods. Fancy and Heavy Groceries. p Fresh Meats in Cold Storage. C Hardware, Stoves and Tinware. DEPT. H Crockery and Glassware. J Furniture. K Electric Supplies. L Plumbing Supplies. M Grain, Hay and Feed Stuifs. N Paints, Oils and Varnishes. O Silverware, Souvenirs and Toyi GROCERIES. We carry full lines of Fancy and Heavy Groceries such brands and assortments as are handled by New England grocers. Dry Goods and Shoes. The Dry Goods and Shoe Departments are complete. Stock bought in Northern markets. Quality our standard for selection. Meat and Fish Market. Poultry, Game, Fish, Oysters and Meats of all kinds constantly in stock. Western Meats handled in cold storage. Hats, Caps and Gents' Furnishings. The latest styles of Hats, Caps and Gents' Furnishings carried in stock. Stationery. A full line of Stationery, both printed and plain, will be found in this department. "The Concord" and "The Lenox" PINEHURST, N. C These houses will be open November 1, 1899, for the accommodation of those who seek a healthful Winter Home. The same personal attention will be given to the wishes and tastes of guests as was accorded to those of "The Concord" last 6eason. Good Table, Comfortable Beds, Electric Lights, Pure Spring Water, Unrivalled Climate. Electric Cars pass the Door. Terms : $8.00 to $12.00 Per Week. J8CSSpecial Rates to those who take rooms for the entire season. Address J. MILTON ROBINSON, Pinehurst, N. C. The Outlook Will be sent postpaid to any address in the United States or Canada SIX MONTHS FOR FIFTY CENTS. Sample copies sent on receipt of address. SUBSCRIBE NOW. SEND IT TO YOUR FRIENDS.
The Pinehurst Outlook (Pinehurst, N.C.)
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Dec. 15, 1899, edition 1
6
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