North Carolina Newspapers

Pag« Two
The Hilltop
^Plain hiving and High Thinkin^^
Entered at the Post Office, Mars Hill, N. C., as Second Class Matter, Feb. 20, 1926
Member Southeastern Junior College Press Association,
Editor Falk Johnson
Associate Editor Hazel Herndon
Managing Editor Sam Justice
Assistant Managing Editor Mark Orr
Society Editor Sara Corpening
State Editor Robert Burnett
Religious Editor Mary Ella Newbrouch
Sports Editor Frank Watson
Alumni Editor Thomas Speed
Poetry Editor Ruamie Squires
Intercollegiate Editor Bill Martin
Faculty Adviser John A. McLeod
Business Manager C. B. Jones
Circulation Manager Albert Suttle
Typists — William Chambers, Elizabeth Shipman
Reporters: Gholston Myrick, Alma Reid, Dorothy Tutt and Pearl Ownby.
Contributors: Wilter Wunchell, Pearl Ownby, Evelyn Morgan, and Ed Bunker.
Mars Hi 11—
by WilierWuncbel I
A Reply
An editorial appearing in the last issue of the Hilltop en
titled “Is It A Homer” occasioned some pointed discussion. Thus,
we believe, it fulfilled a purpose of an editorial.
The unfavorable comments, perhaps, have been based upon a
faulty evaluation to some extent at least. When considered as rep
resentative of Mars Hill campus life, the misdemeanors discussed
in the editorial highly misrepresent the situation. The picture thus
represented is incomplete. Only an undesirable phase of the actual
condition has been magnified. The larger and really desirable sec
tor has been ignored. It is the fact that the misdemeanors criticized
were no/ truly representative that compelled our criticism. Because
this was an undesirable part of the picture we sought to impel its
It has been suggested that we should not publish our faults to
outsiders. The Hilltop is predominantly a campus paper. Its duty
is predominantly toward campus problems. By far the most of its
readers are directly associated with the dormitory problem dis
cussed. We believe our greatest duty is toward our greatest constit
uency, Because our constituency was definitely interested in the
dormitory problem, and because the Hilltop is definitely in con
tact with them we publish the editorial.
We appreciate the interest aroused by the article. We realize
that we are subject to mistakes. We can only correct them after an
interested friend points them out to us. We shall consider the sug
gestions made in the future—we thank you fOr the ones already
Well, gentle readers, they have
served notice on me that this will be
my last chance to sling mud because
the new staff will take charge next
issue. Well, all good things must come
to an end sooner or later, I have
heard. I’ll try to shower a little dirt
on everybody this time for a parting
remembrance, but don’t feel hurt if
I happen to overlook you.
Chapter 4
What do you think of a young man
who would st^nd in front of a drug
store in Greensboro and drink a coco
cola in the presence of five young
ladies without offering them one?
Evidently the young ladies didn’t
think so much. But perhaps he was
remembering an old Mars Hill regu
lation which states that the co-eds
are not to partake of such strong
drinks as Coca-cola. Git up. Bo-mar!
It seems that Myrick and
Norden will have competition
from a new angle Owens to the
fact that a certain young gen
tleman visited the girls' society
the other day and provided the
inspiration for the singing of
“A Farewell to Arms”, by a cer
tain blonde member of the
Our Request
The indications are that this will be the only special alumni is
sue of the Hilltop this year. We regret that this is the case. We
wish that the scope of the paper were enlarged to include not only
the campus constituency of the College but also the alumni. Their
interests are, to some extent, the same.
If the Hilltop at regular intervals—quarterly or monthly—were
devoted to alumni welfare it would rightfully become not only a
campus institution, but also an alumni organ. This is a dream. It
may be one of those good things that are never accomplished. It
may be that a separate graduate publication would be preferable.
But we are eager to offer Hilltop pages to alumni use if deemed
, wise.
^ We are not aggressive in this project. We do not want to en
courage something unwanted. We are, however, extremely will-
'ing and unreservedly ready to cooperate with former students in
-this, as in other, respects insofar as it does not seriously conflict with
campus obligations and insofar as we are financially able.
Is this offer unwanted.?
Does it appeal to your We will meet you half way. It is your
We recently heard of the unique
way in which a fair co-ed handles her
city note correspondence. After she
has received a note from each of her
many suitors, she places them all in
a hat, shakes them up, draws them
out and readdresses them and sends
them back. I understand that the sys
tem is working well, so far, but I
shudder to think what would happen
if one of the competitors received the
.same note he sent.
“Yes,” echoed little Scrammy
Robot. “Where can Papa and Mama
be found?”
“They didn’t leave a forwarding
address when they left,” said Sammy
mechanically, “and I am sure that I
haven’t the slightest idea as to their
whereabouts. However,” he added, “I
shall turn on my brain and see if I
can possibly think of the solution.”
Sammy twisted his left ear and a
peculiar drone w’as heard within his
little block head. The buzzing con
tinued for the space of several min
utes and then Sammy tweaked his ear
di.sgustedly and the noise ceased
“My cerebellum simply refuses to
function” he moaned. “But let us get
in our mechanical car and ride until
we find them. Maybe it will be mech
anically drawn to the place w’here
Mama and Papa are.”
So little Sammy and Scrammy
set out in their mechanical car in
search of their Papa and Mama.
In the meanwhile Mr. and Mrs.
Adam and Eve a la Crusoe had com
pleted the first leg of their honey
moon jaunt, reaching San Francisco
on the night of April 9. As they drove
dowTi Market St. in a cab, Mr. a la
Crusoe noted a hugh sign which hung
across the entire -width of the street
bearing the following information
“Welcome back Prosperity -with lega
beer—at Hottendorfer’s Beer Gar
den—3.2 beer and wine at popular
“Well, Mama,” states Mr. Adam a
la Crusoe. “I feel as though there
g W
A place of refugee
Where honesty^; qe'
A place of comfoi
While snuggled jina(h
breast. I the
A place for tendtrl-asoi
To learn life’s Tmp
truth; [fray.
place where
And character^
y th
A place where pn
Where lovers le«unds
A place where and
When angels belt ey '
oth I
A place where nuie *a
Despite the faahouj
passed; grab
A place in ruin bjrts’
The many yean :r
A place w'here inf to I
The backbone See
A place where magral
To enter in lif^g w
1 ts
A narro-w, rugg
The fragrance of|
A tinkling, joyot
And a silver riNn
’Tis Spring.
Faded Winter
Flack and
McRorie and
Saray and
The song of hapi^ ^
would be no better way to inaugur- ‘ A dash of brown p
ate our honeymoon than with a few | And Mr. Squirrel
steins of honest-to-goodness beer. Over soft, bro-wn
The staff, in preparation for this issue, mailed several letters
requesting information. The returns have been highly satisfactory
for our purpose. We feel that in this instance—and in others—
it would be impossible to carry on suitably except for outside co
operation. A college without helpful graduates would have its ac
tivities and scope amputated. It would be a deformed, incomplete
Bill Leister hat constructed a
440 track around the lower ten
nis courts. He may be teen run
ning wildly most any afternoon
after tennis balls which Rema
misted while observing hit antics.
This “Twilight Promenade” is just
about the hottest thing out. A few
more social privileges along this na
ture and w'e might be able to kid
ourselves into believing that we were
some-where other than Mars Hill. I
understand that it is to be a weekly
affair, which is okeh by your corres
pondent, but it wouldn’t hurt my
feelings if it w’ere to be made a
nightly affair. And while we are
evoluting it why not make it compul
sory? Who knows but what two
hearts that beat as one might be
brought together through such ar
rangements. However, one great
danger looms: It is heart rending to
see such great lovers as Pearl and
Fox or Nestor and Johnny torn from
each other by the “Patrol,” Mrs. Bur
What say you.”
“You’re calling it, Papa,” «he
replies coyly.
They made their way to the garden
and were .soon seated at a table in a
cosy little nook. A German waiter,
wreathed in .smiles, approached them.
“Ach! my goot frien’s. Vat vill it
“The best in the house!” order
ed Mr. a la Crusoe.
At that time Sammy and Scrammy,
driving aimlessly, were slowly wind
ing their way into the outskirts of
San Franci.sco.
’Tis Spring.
An Oak, bearing
Sweethearts stroll,
Bmnehes fiourislil
nninches flourisral
For the first glirnd
’Tis Spring. V
* «
Buck says that women are like
street cars, but he missed connections
in Chapel Hill.
Ninety-Nine Out of a Hundred
Youth lives chiefly in the present j chapel speakers often deal
with the future.
The vague dreams, hopes, and aspirations of youth are con
cerned with a future that is only a mind image. Dreams that
should be directed, but nevertheless—dreams.
Ninety-nine out of a hundred chapel speakers address their
message to youth. Ninety-nine out of a hundred chapel speakers
give youth worthy ideals, splendid suggestions, sage advice—for
the future. They speak of the “day to come,” “the great beyond,”
and the “out there.” These dawning days simply do not exist
for the average student. He has not the slightest idea where “out
there” is. And advice for that time, no matter how sound, falls
upon ears that prompt little immediate action.
May we all pause a moment in
silent tribute to Bill Moore, the
great “silent lover.” We don’t
know whether this is a new kind
of line or not, but it must be
good. “Silent Cal” managed to
get by on it, anyway.
Your columnist hereby nominates
the Hilltop staff party for first hon
ors as the ritziest social blowout of
the season. The moon was just right,
the stars shimmered their encourage
ment, the atmosphere was perfect. . .
and a good time was had by several.
Patient followers, my fingers
droop meditatively over the keys as
I prepare to peck off this final para
graph. For two years it has been my
privilege to bring you in each issue
this column which is commonly known
(Continued on page 3)
Chapter 5
As they neared the city limits
Sammy and Scrammy went over an
unforseen bump and several of their
most necessary screws fell out.
“Oh, oh,” cried Sammy.
“Oh, oh,” cried Scrammy. “We are
losing our screws! What will become
of us?”
Perhaps we can hold every
thing until we get to San Fran
cisco” encouraged Sammy. “Sit
They passed over the other bumps
without undue damage and finally
arrived in San Francisco. They saw
the banners announcing the return of
prosperity and the arrival of beer.
Upon reading it Scrammy jumped
up and down, for joy and four bolts
and six screw’s proceeded to fall out.
“Oh Scrammy, you are falling a-
part,” cried Sammy.
I guess I’m losing my
hold on things,” Scrammy re
plied mournfully.
“Well, come in here, and have a
glass of beer and you will feel bet
ter,” suggested Sammy.
So they stopped at the first beer
garden they came to, which was in
the rear of a filling station and pro
ceeded to thread their w’ay to a table.
After gallantly downing sever
al glasses of beer, Scrammy sud
denly sprang to his feet. He rote
to tuddenly that teveral more
tcrewt and boltt fell out. Hit
mechanical brain had conceived
an idea!
“Niagara Falls!” he cried. Niagara
Falls! Why didn’t we think of that
before! Of course they’re gone to
Niagara Falls!”
By C.
Life is what I mil
For I command ’
It’s my own, I oil
So let the fierd
n V
* * 4> *
Chapter 6 (conclusion)
But no sooner than the steel w’ords
had fallen from Scrammy’s screwed
mouth, Sammy gave a jump and bolt
ed tow’ard a back table where side
If I make use of
To aid my fell^'^
I have no fears al
The winds, my
I have no fear of i
I’ve let by-gonei!
For I must face et
Without a tear?
by side a-sipping
Mama Adam and
their iron hands
bolt on top of the
“Oh Papa and
found our Papa
ed Sammy and
squeaky voice.
Mr. and Mrs
Crusoe unw’ound
drew them from
clasped the two
Robots to their h
and placed most
upon their fast u
“Why my de.
culated Papa Ai
‘Wherever did
little Messers Sa
fell plop-ploping ii
beer that w’as cro
at the edge of t]
ma. “Our lovely
cannot go on. The
to go back home.”
By and by all
little beer garden
“washer” tears of
place began to qui
der. Then a bi
sw’ept it clean of
four Robots cla
lizzie, screwed
ways, and rattled
screw’s, nuts and kn
against the other aa
familiar tune of

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