v
VOL. III.
■rEs:®
MONKOE EIQEIEEE
MOKEOE. E. G., TUES])AY, JULY
1875,
NO
PUBLISHED BY
W i 11 i a m O. W O 1 f Gj
Editor and Proprietor.
S-2 0.0
i GO
50
fl 00
60
SUBSORlPTiON HATp!
Oro Ye^r, : : : : ;
wtonths, : : : : >
TUc'3R Sionths, : : ; :
£DVF.RTISlf«a RAILS i
One Square, of ten lines, first insertion
JCach subsequent insertion,
^1?'“ Obituaries, iilty Cents per square.
Tlie inuviieife r,i vearlv advertiser is
stncily limited to tlieip ov^p juin^ecliute and
regular business; and the busnveb.s ot an ad-
Vditising iirm is pot eon.siderod us incuiujiug
that ot the indivuiual nioiJibero.
piS" Advertiseracnts not m;q;lrei:]. ^villi the
puniber ot insertions when hiunded in, will
lie continued uuiu ordered oui. and charged
{^eoordmgiv.
No advertiaoincnts inserted gratnit;
pusly.
Advertisements of an ahu.sive nature
vpill not bo mserteci at any price.
pis'" The tee tor amiouniiig candidates i.s
to be paid in advance in every case.
pij ■ No deviation from these terms under
p.ny civcurasumcos.
Contract Advertisements taken at low rates.
T). A. Cot'higtoii,
^ *
Y
AYL
MAQMM
MONEOE, N. 0.
Y'lll practice In all the Courts of this and ad-
joinmg Gouulies. Special attention given to
1 Jie ooiloctioii ot clann.-i, and all business on-
tj'iisted to Ills care proinplly executed. Ciiico
pver Peoples Bank. C-ly.
Jas. F. Payne,
ATTGPXr V AT A.ATV,
MQlfEQE, C.
s of Union and
^clethb- |)0drj?.
A UOMMOS THOUCUT.
Somewlieve on Uiis earOiI}' plane^",
III the clhst of i|o.wers to be,
In the dewdrops, in tlic sanshiiio,
Sleeps a solemn cpiy foi’ ine.
,4t tljis walieful hour of midnight,
I behold it dawn in mist.
And I hear a sound of sobbing
Through the darkness—hist! Oh,
hist! ■ .
In a dim and jpurky
I am breatliing life away;
Some one draws a curtain softly
And I wat.ch the broadening day,
As it purples in the zenith.
As it brightens on the lawn;
There’s a hush of death, about me,
And a whisper, ‘ U") is gone.”
i'torg.
iViU pvachec in all the c
a<l,)nininc coiiilhca. Proiiijjt alteiUiou
to all bnsmesR e.nlrnattal to ins
Otlice- Ifp-Silairs in tint Court Hou;:ie.
you can't al'i'ord it,'
“Oh, I couldn’t do that!
body else gives
C. M.
T. IMcC
ATTOPFY AT
A/pefen- in
ai 1G
rracticGS ti'. tije bnpe
vourts 01 Hi
rl nd
A U L E Y,
UV,
i iL-niplcy,
A
and SJr.prainc
.lid tnc Federal Gonrts
NELl.Y’S SUBSCilll’TIOSi
oit,
CUAlilTY BEGINS AT HOME.
EV SIIIKLEY BnOWXE.
■‘If y.3u irloase, mem, Mrs. Dean
Pinkney’s in the piarlor, and wants to
spieak with you.”
Nelly tvater.s threw uj) both her
hand in distiitiy.
“Mrs. Dean Pinkney ? Oh, I know,
it’s that odious subscription ptaper
again, for tlio sufferers from tlie Clies-
sington hre, WTiat shall I do ?”
“Be frank -with her at opee,” said
Laura Lisle, w'no was spending the
morning with her friend, “and tell her
SDH,- AAA- C- 'UK. A XvrSA^-Ar
Practicing i'lrfsician,
Jlaviiig loGiitcd in rO'onrnc, offsr.s IiIk jiTofcs-
fiioiml st-rvice.s to the cilizen.s of Alouroc and
viciiiitj', and HoUedts ti hiiareot puk'lic puiTou-
iu'o. . :37-tf
•p. S. TRAYWTOK
J, E. 'Cn.VYW'ICK
p. S. TiiAYtvroK & Soy,
SURQEON DENTISTS,
Having located
tiY ill Afonroo, of-
fen* their ]■)!■( )fes-
sioiihl services
the jmbiie.
■ nFNN Oiteof themcaii
always befouiul
at the othce, aiul
the other will- visit patieuts la the
C'onittry vvhf n desD'ed.
Oflice m tho rooms over the Peo-
ide’fi Enig 8:ore. 29--if.
IJOBACE SMIl'H.
rKACl’ICATj
t \N > U.VO.i.i'R,
A'MT) DEAEEH TN
FINE JEYl I ix\ VINE. WA-j'UHES,
i;iN(t sn mu 11 silver
SPEO-
INU
11 VLl J) \1U
TAOEES.
M 0 i\ h O 1
a.
FINE WATCHES repaivQ(] ta-tlifnlly.
scieutili.’ullv and warranted.
2G-tf
Fr esh Arriva.ls!
\ I;OT of Imported IVines and
Brandies ^ust received at the well
known and long-eslablisliod Pirst-
class Drug- Store of
IV. H. SMITH & CO.
41-tf.
NOTICE.
A LL PERSONS HAYING claims
:l\ against tho E.state of H.arvey E.
Stack, dec’J will iiresent the same for
ipaynieut without delay.
SARAH A. STACK, ] ,
A. E. STEVENS, )
June 7, 1875.- 2-t£.
WANTED.
4 LOT
:/\ for which th
juices will be paid
LOT of fat Beef Cattle and Sheep,
lii,g%est njarlu't
AUSTIN & HOUSTON.
May 13, '876.-51-11
FOR RENT!
A new and conyenioiit Dwelling
'House, containing tliree'rooms, with
'a lire-p>lace in each room. Apply to
OGBURN & ARMPIELD.
June 5, 1875.'-2-tt.
TOBdVGOO.
40 Boxes ccmmoiT to best grades for sale
‘cheap for c.ish
Bv A. -F. STEVENS A GO.
48Af.
Every-
else gives soinethiiig and I
should be mortified to death to have
Mrs, Ifcrsa Piidiards or Marian Hunt
ington call D'lo mean and stingy.”
‘T don’t believe in c itting your coat
■according to your neighbor's clotli,”
sai<l Lanra, dryly.
Nor I either—hut what is a body
to Jo'? ()h, I inust give something!
Aud so Nelly went down stains into
the neatly furni.-Jied little pavloi',
where sat Mrs. Dean Pinkney, a pro
digious old lady with a mole under
the fade of her iiQse, a visible beard
on her upper lije, and sncli an amount
of jewplr3' hung about her that she
looked like a captive in black velvet
and g'lided chains,
“You’U cACUso my calling on you at
such a very early hour, Miss Water,s,”
•said Mrs. Dean Piiiknoy, surveying
lier victim tlmougli a gold eye-glas.s.
“Ob, not ali,” .said Xall-V, feebl}',
“liut,” went on the ok] lady, “I
thought yoti -svould esteem it a privi
lege to coiiti-ibute your mile towards
tho needs of suffering humanity.”
‘ Of course,” .siiid Nolly, uneasily
twisting the turquoise ring upon her
lingpr, around and around.
“Here is thep.aper,” said Mrs. Dean
Pinkney. ‘'The other ladies of the
church have contributed libcrailjp as
you will see, I hope that your hand
and heai't will be open also.”
And jSIrs. Dean Pinkney folded her
Iji'.aceleted arms, and looked, heaven-
\vard,
Nelly lYatci’S glanced nervously
over the paper. ]\Irs. Sylvestry had
put down twenty-five dollars—Mrs.
lYriqthpslejp twenty—Marian Hunt
ington, twenty—Helen Qanohle, ten
— the other names became blurred be
fore her eves in the exeiteinent and
anxiety of the nioinont. She had sup
posed that a dollar or two would have
been the extent of the contribution ex
pected froni her—but with al] these
antecedent,s before her eyes, liow
could she venture to inscribe her
hianie for such a pitiful sum? And
so, with shaking pencil, she wrote
down “Ellen 'tYaters, $5.00,” and gave
back tho paper, feeling ineffably small
in the eyes of Mrs. Doan Pinkney'.
“Afucii obliged. I’m sure,” said that
lady, with a scprcely djs.cornible ring
of contempt in her smooth accepts,
“IVoiild it be convenient to you to
pay tho subscription now ? Because,”
with a sort of grim chuckle, “I pm
quite a busine.ss woman, and I am mak
ing a ready-money tr.ansaction of it.”
Nelly Waters biased scarlqfc. Wlis"
she had written down her subscrip
tion, she had intended to meet it at
some future time—this ^sff^deu de
mand took he-r entirely unawares.—
Mortified and bitterly embarrassed,
slie was about to mutter .forth some
excuse, when she suddenly-remember
ed that her father liad that iBorning
given her five dollars to. pay Bridget
the laundress, aud that the bill still
lay in her pocket.
“Certainly—of course,” she assent-
as, drawing forth the money, she saw
it absorbed in Mr.s. Dean Pinkney’s
grea.t, gold-clasped portemonnaie.
So th-G great lady waddled out, and
climbing into her clarence, told the
coachman to drive to the house of her
next victim, and Nelly IVaters return
ed up stair.s, feeling very like a squeez
ed orange.
“H(iw much did von give ?'’ asked
Laura Lisle.
“Five dollars,” Nelly answered.—
“Exactly five times more than I could
aiforci; but eveiwbody else put down
at least double that, and I was asham
ed to appear stingy or poverty-strick
en,”
“Charity begins at home,” said Lau
ra, gravelv'.
And when Bridget Reilly oaine,
Nelly was forced to put her off with
excuses instead of ca.sli.
“I’m so sorry, Bridget—but you
shall certainly have the money next
week. ”
Bridget’s honest face clcuded over.
“But, Miss Nelly, the master told
me I could Ua'vo it to-day, sure. And
the rent is due—and the board for
my sister’s ailing babj' in the country,
and
The Gonsoionaness of having done
wrong did not sweeten Nolly’s tem
per.
“There, there, Bridget, don’t bo in
solent,” said she, biting her lip. “I
have told you once that you could not
have the money until next week. If
you will come then, I will try to ac-
c.)mmodate yon.”
So Bridget went awaj', with slow
steps and a heavy lioart.
“Poor thing!” said Laura Lisle.
“S'lie loolced as if slie wanted, the mon
ey. I a;n sorry' for her,”
“So am I,” said Nelly, striving to
speak ligbily. “But what could I
do-?”
“I can’t let you have the rent to
night, Mr. Nolan,” said Bridget, sadly,
when the little hump-backed man of
whom she rented her one room made
his appearance, as usual, at her door.
Michael 'Nolan did not carry out the
generad iilea of the “stern and grip
ing landlord,” being a mild, easy-go-
iug old man, whose heart w'as open to
every piteo’us appeal.
“Not let mo have it ? But, Bridget,
woman, I m'ast liave it U cried he. “I
can’t make out the money for Jimmy’s
California pas.'jage without it—and the
\vifo aud children tliat are earning
down to San Erancisco to meet him,
will be 0.1 expense another week,
You promised me, Bridget, and I de
pended on your word.”
“I know that, sir,” said Bridget,
meekly; ‘'and if every one, gentle or
simple, kept tlieir word, there’d bo
less trouble in this world of ours,
alias "Waters disappointed mo, sir—
and I’m as sorry as you can bo.”
“Not quite, I g’uess,” said Michael
Nolan, slowly. ‘■Bscauso my Jimmy’s
a wild lad, and has got into bad com
pany, and another week among those
lads won’t do him any good. I was
in hopes I could have got him off by'
the steamer that sails to-morrow, but
if I can’t I can’t, and so tliere’s an end
of it.”
land he turned away with a heavy
sigh.
“Let me see the list,” said old Mr.
Giksey, taking it from his wife’s hand
and scrutinizing it with eager specta
cled eyes. “Ah! ah! yes, Ellen Wa-
“Georgo Gilsey, upon whom I de
pended for financial aid and tolerance,
has suddenly turned against me. With
hi.s aid I might possibly Jiave -(iveath-
ered the storm; without it my poor
little ship has gone t'iYuiu, I had
told him how hard I Vlas pressed;
but it seems he caught i.i.ght of some
charity subscription, i.‘t*‘.yhich your
name w'as put down for a larger
amount than he judged wise or judio-
.13, and—,
“Ob! papa,” sobbed out Nolly, “it
was Mrs. Dean Pi]ikne3 ^subscrition.
But I have ruined j'ou.”
“D m’t fret my dear,’" said the old
man, kindl}', “You’ll b*- wiser some
of these days. And it’s no use cry-
g for spilt milk.” ^
Poor kjelly! She punished
quite sufficiency for her sin. It was
well that she did not real the para
graph in the dailj' paper,i'wlierein was
chronicled the ,sad death of Michael
Nolan’s nevor-do-well sea, who was
killed in 'a drunken b.':awl on the
evening of the veiy day m which be
was to have sailed for Cwjfornia, had
Ellen dVaters paid tlie liiuiidress, and
the laundress jiaid her landlord the
five dollars which wont into Mrs.
Dean Pinkae3’’s purse kn' so-coiled
charitj',
And that was the history of Nelly
Waters’s subscription.
d¥lt5rcn:rnfAb'j.
4?'’ I
Riaghig lor (he W ater I5oy.
A good story is told of a verdant
one who was passengei\,m a railway
express train, and became thirsty.
‘‘Where’s that ’ere boy with the w'a-
tor can ?” ho queried of his nex:t neigh
bor.
“He h s gone forwar-:] to the bag-
gag'C-car, I suppose,” was the reply.
“IVall, d’ye s’pose I Ida get him
back here agin T’
“Certainly,” said the other, “you
have only to ring for liim;” and he
nodded toward the hell line that ran
above their heads. *■
No sooner said than .done. Before
,.,,anp one cord'd P;i;eycnt|^' P’fStic .bad
seized the line and'gave it a tremend
ous tug. Tho coiiscquenod^ were at
once obvious; tliree shriil ■ Whistles
W'ere lieaYd, half dozen brakemen ran
to their posts, and the tram came to
a stand still with a suddenness that
startled'half tho passengers with as
tonishment, and cause'! every man
near a window to hoist it and look out
to see what was tho matter.
In a few minutes the conductor,
red anil excited,'came foaming into
the car to know who imlled the bell
rope.
“Here, mister, this way; I’m the
man,” shouted the offender, drawing
all eyes upon him.
“You !” said tho conductor. “'What
did yo’d do it for ?” ‘
“Cos I wanted some water.”-
“"Wanted some "water ?”
“Sartin; I wanted the water boy
aud my pardner here in the seat sai
I’d better ring for him'.
The shout of laughter that greete
this honest confession, was too niuc
for the conductor, aud he had to wa;
until he had got his train under wa
before he explained the mysteries c
ters, five dollars. And after IVaters pgjj rope to his verdant customei
only this morning t-elling me he was
A Successful Trick.
A yonng and skillful disciple of
Robert Loudon was some time ago
traveling in the northern provinces of
France, giving exhibitions in natural
magic, in company with a young ivag,
now director of a printing establish
ment in Paris. In their wanderings
they arrived at the town of R ,
more renowned for its manufactures
than for the natural brillianey of its
inhabitants. Here the receipts of the
m.igician were absolutely nolliing, and
despair reigned in the hearts of our
two adventurers. What was now to
he done ?
“By my faith!” exclaimed the as
sistant magician, “it will never do to
say that we did not make our expen
ses ! I have it! Let me write a pos
ter for one or more entertainments,
and if the attraction don’t answeis
call me no assistant for a high priest
of diablerie. ‘At the urgent request
of the large and intelligent audiences
of our former entertainments, wo have
consented to perform the astounding
feat of making the cathedral bell ring
any hour indicated by' any of the au
dience.' To take place this evening.’
There, how will that do ?”
“.But how are you to fulfil the prom
ise ?■”
“0, never mind. Am I not a wor
thy pupil of a skilful master ? Leave
that to me.”
Night came, and with it a crowd of
the curious. All went off well, and
now camo the feat’ure of the evening.
And one was askod to name a num
ber.
“Four !” camo from the crowd.
In fear and trembling the mighty
magician extended his hands toward
the cathedral, when one! two I three!
four! boomed from the cupola. The
cold perspiration started on the exhib
itor’s bi'O'w, and the audience shouted
with delight and surprise.
“Encore! encore!” resounded from
all parts of tho room. “Again!”
What was to be done ? But a voice
from behind thg curtain said—
“Go ahead, old boy—it’s all right!”
With exhibitor
I'opb- .
and the apfic'mtQrf departed, filled
with enthusiasm.
“']Vhat in the name of wonder have
you been doing ?” exclaimed the puz
zled principal to his laughing assis
tant, as soon as the doors ivere closed-
“Why, I gave the bell-ringer five
francs to stay in the belfry and ring
as many times as I placed candles in
the window, and I think it succeeded
pretty well,” replied the other, shak
ing the w'ell filled cash-box.
The next day, as they were starting
in the cars, one of the city oouuoellors
came to them and begged that they
would explain the miracle.
“It is magnetism, my friend
A (.loml Stiiry.
Tlie following anecdote i;s related of
Mr. Sheaf, a grocer, iii Portsmouth,
N. H.;
It appears that a man had pur
chased some wool of him, which had
been weighed and paid for, and Jlr.
Sheaf had gone to ■ the desk to get
change for a note. Happening to
turn his head while there, he saw in
a glass which swung so as to relleot
the shop, a stout arm reach up and
take from tho shelf a heavy white oak
cheese. Instead of appeai'ing sudden
ly and rebuking him for the theft, as
another would, and tUcre’oy losing his
custom forever, the crafty' old gentle
man gave the thief his change as if
nothing had happened, and then, un
der pretence of lifting the bag to lay
it on his horse for him, took hold of it,
and exclaimed:
“Why bless me, I must have reck
oned tho weight wrong,”
“Oh, no,” said the other, “you may
be sure you have not, for I counted
■with you.”
“Well, well, wo won’t dispu'ie the
matter, it is easily tried,” said Mr. S.,
putting the bag into tho scales again.
“There,” said he, “I told you so—I
knew I was right—I made a mistake
of nearly tiventy pounds; however, if
you don’t want the whole of it you
needn’t have it—I’ll take a part of it
out.”
“No, no!” said the other, staying
the hands of Mr. S. on their way' to
the strings of the bag, “I guess I’ll
take the whole.”
And this he did, paying for dishon
esty by receiving the skim cheese at
the rate of forty^fonr cents a pound,
the price of the wool.
le;ts
:mt ||itni0irapl)5.
A D'ublin chambermaid is said to
have got twelve commercial travelers
into eleven bedrooms, and yet to have
given each a S'perate room. Here
we have tho eleven bedrooms:
“Now,” says she, “if two of you gen
tlemen will go into No. 1 bed-room
e.nd wait a few minutes, I’ll find a
spake rooia lor'one of yoti as i-oon as
I’ve shown the others to their rooms.
Well, now, having thus bestowed two
gentlemen in No. 1, she puts the third
in No. 2, the fourth in No. 3, the fifth
in No. 4, the sixth in No. 5, the sev
enth in No. 6, tho eighth in No. 7, the
ninth in No. 8, the tenth in No. 9, the
eleventh in No. 10. She then came
back to No. 1, where you will remem
ber she had left the twelth gentleman
alone ivith the first, aud said, “I’ve
accommodated all the rest, and have
still a room to spare; so if one of y'ou
■will step into No. 11, you will find it
empty.” Thus the twelfth man got
I his bedroom. Of course there is a hole
said ! in the saucepan somewhere; but we
the magician, with a grand flourish of | leave the reader to determine exactly
his hand; and the magistrate dep.art- where the fallacy is, vrith just a warn
ed, much edified.
liSUeaNEK & C.ILDER BKO.
Wilmmgton, N. 0.
ing to think twice before declaring as
to whi(jli, ■ if any, of the ti avelers was
the “odd man out.”
as we ao
the hotel, an’ so I yanked the rop(
Will he be along soon'? An’ ))y thbarrels Sugar,
by what in the thundir ho, you stop 75 Bags Coffoo,
pin’fai'?”
Sugar, Coffee and Tobacco.
A good hymn for the Centennial
would be Old Hundred.”
About the best three physicians
known are said to be Drs. Diet, Quiet,
and Merryman.
An assessor asked a woman how
many chickens she had, and, doubt
ing her w'ord, paroceeded to count
them. She took him to the bee-hive,
kicked it over, and invited him to
count the bees.
“We have a line of bonds here that
we should like to dispose of,” said tho
mayor of an Indiana village to a rail
road p)resident. “What are they ?”
asked tho president. “Vagabonds,”
answered the mayor.
Upon the death of her husband a
woman married his brother, and when
a 'friend saw the portrait of the first
husband in the house, ho asked, ‘Ts
this a member of your family?” “It is
my poor brother-in-law,” she said.
Excludisq and Including.—A wag
one day asked his friend; “How many
knaves do you suppooso are in this
street besides yourself?” “Besides
mj'self ?” repeated tho other in a'heat.
“Do you mean to insult me !” “Well,
then, ” said the first, how many do
you reckon, including yourself!”
A pirofessor who stated that one
cannot taste in the dark, as nature
intends us to see our food, was dis
concerted by a student’s exclaiming,
“How about a blind man's dinner ?”
But he recovered himself, and answer
ed, “Nature has provided him with
eye-teeth, sir ?”
A j'oung man in the vicinity of
Mooresvillo carried his girl to Char^
lotte to see the Centennial, and while
in one of his reckless moods, bought
a ginger cake for himself, a package
of snuff for his girl, and remarked, as
he moved off Independence Square,
“S'usie, if piapi kuowed what a spiree
I’m on he’d break my neck.”
Gipsy Wit.—A short time since, two
young ladies near Camberwell, Eng
land, were acecsted by a gipsy wo
man, who told them that for a shil
ling each she would show them their
hu.sband’s faces in a pail of water;
which being brought, they exclaimed:
“We only see our own faces!”
“Weil,” said the old woman, “those
faces will be your husbands’ when you
are married. _
The Ideal and the Real.—“Ah, if I
were only half as good a man as she
is a woman!” said a loving husband
to himself, tenderly regarding his wife
through the crack of the half-opieii
door of the room, where she wa.3 sit
ting with clasped hands and closed
eyes, as if in holy communion with
her Maker. “What a picture for an
artist, just as she looks now—praying,
no doubt, for her piaster.” Then he
stole softlj' into the apiartment, hop
ing not to arouse her, but she spirang
toward him, eagerly exclaiming, “O,
Charlie ! “I’ve been thinking ever so
much if I hadn’t better send thatbon-
Dead in a Cbystal Coeein.—An in
teresting but melancholy discovery net back to be retrimmed.
100 Boxes Tobacco.
For sale by
KEKOHNEE & OALDEH BEOS.
Wilmington, N. C.'
ed, with a little e:itch iu her breath,
“straining every nerve to meet his
necessary exjienses.,” aud actually liav_
ing the face to ask me far amother
flve-thousand-dollar-loan to tide over
this tight ])lace in hisbasiiicss affairs.
T wonder if he calls this a necessary
cxpiense ?”
“My dear, my dear,*’ argued his
wife “you foi’got that this is iu char-
itp.”
“Charity! S.tuff and no.nsanse !”
barked out tho old gentlemen, using
Laura Lisle’s voi'y words; “charity
begins at home. Yv’eU, at any rate,
my eyes are opienod. AVaters may
go elsewhere for hi.s money, and I
shall at once call in what I hagte al
ready been fool enough to. lend him.”
Mr. Gilsey was as good—or rather
as bad as his word—aud two or three
days afterwards pioor Josiah Waters
cams home from his store with bowed
head and melancholy fiioe.
“Papa,” cried N'sllj', '“what is The
matter ? Are you ill ?”
“Heartsick, child,” the merchant
answered. “Nolly,' you nnist make
up) your mind to a great change in
life. I have failed !”
“Failed papa ?'’
Many citizens of Monroe Township
not having been notified of the ineet-
ing alleged to have been held on the
loth inst. for the purpose of nominat
ing a candidate for the office of Justice
How TO Get Along.—Don’t stop) tc
tell stories in business hours.
If you have a place of business, bcof^tho Peace in said Township, and
found there when wanted. considering tlie action of said meeting
No man can get iich by sittinguot to be expressive of the sentiment
lilt T ’ O' tlie people, woukt respeetiully an-
arouna the stores and saioons. ^ c<^ o o T\r nATTTi?v
. , . , . ,, nounce S. S. b. McGAUJUiLY, ii-sq.,
Never lool lu business maUers. ^ candidate for the office of Justice
Have order, sy-stein;regularity, andof the Peace. Many Citizens.
also p)rom])tness. July 14,1875.
Do not meddle w'itli business you
know notbing of. ,
1S15
Do not kick every stone in your
piath.
More miles can be made i)i one day
by going steadily than by stopping.
Pay as you go.
A mpiii of honor respeota hia word
as ho docs his bond.
Help athers when you can, but
nevei give what p'ou cannot afford be
cause it is fashionable.
Lcurn to say No. No necessity of
snapipiing it out dog-fashion, but say
it firmly and respectfully.
Use ,3'our o-wn brains rather than
those of others.
Learn to think and act for your
self.
LOUISVILLE WEEKLY
An Odd V/agee.—Jones, who is a
very small man, bet Smith who is a
ton man, that he could carry liim
twice around the hippodromo, A large
number of ladies aud gentlemen at
tended to witness the jjrooeoding.
“Now, Smith, I am ready. Take
off your clothes.”
“What! strip myself? You don’t
was made the other day at tho foot
of Mont Blanc. A block of ice, sepi-
arated from the mass of the moun
tain by the thaw', i-illed down into
the valley. Upon closer examination
it wa.s found to contain enclosed tho
remains of the American John Black
ford, who about three years since at-
tempited an ascent, aud has never
since been heard of.
He evidently met with his death on
that oceasio.i, aud has since laid in
hia .cold crystalline coffin, which has
pirescrved Ifis bodj' and clothing ad
mirably. When fo,uud his features
were unchanged, as if he had only
breathed his last half an hour before.
A woman in St. Louis who started
to jump) in the river and drown her
self, suddenly remembered that she
'Jjiad left tho oat in the pantry, and
•hurried back home. She afterwards
said: “The idea of me strugglin’ in
the water, and thinkiii’ that that cat
was a lickin’ the cream off’u ray milk
in the piantry, at that very minute, was
more’u I could bear.”
“I bet CO carry j’su, but not a par
ticle of yoOT'Clothes. '.Come, let’s pro
ceed. It .'won’t do to disappioint tnese
ladits and ..gentlemen.”
But Smith was inflexible. He blush
ed at the bare thought of showing
himself in the thin costume of Verms
energiug fi’-cm the waves. So the re-
Keep) ahead rather than behind tho j fei'ee decided that Jones—had won
limes. ' the bet..
“You talk to me in that way! Why,
I knew the time you hadn’t got a
shirt to vour back,” exclaimed a pub
lican reproachfully to a m-an who "was
urging the impropriety of his uusi-
ness. “I confess it,” was the repfiy,
“but it was before I quit visiting your
house. Since I joined the Good Tempi-
lars I can muster a clean one every
d;iy in the week.
He was sitting upon the curbstone,
holding the piapier up before him, side-
w'ays, and trying to read some adver
tisements. He didn’t know anything
about the goat coming toward him
until he saw his head piop through
tho piapier, and felt it land just about
amidships. He was the sickest look
ing darky for about half an hour that
we over savq and when thej’ got him
warm and limber enough to see and
breathe, he looked up) and said,
“Gemmsn, dat’s de third boat dat’s
bust her bilers an’ sent me ashore.
Is I gwine to git ober dis ?”
Fkanklin’s Joke.—Tradition has it
that years ago, when Benjamin Frank
lin was a young lad, he began the
study of natural piliilosopihy, and soon
became fond of apipilying technical
names to eoinmoii objects. One even
ing, -when he mentioned to his father
that he had swallowed some marina
acephalous mollusks, the old man was
much alarmed, and, suddenly seizing
him, called loudly for help. Mrs.
Franklin came -with some warm water,
and the hired man rushed in with a
garden pump). They forced half a
gallon of water down Benjamin’s
throat, thou held him by the heels
over the edge of the porch and shook
him, while the old man said, “If we
don’t get them things out of Benny
he will be pizened, sure.” When they
were out, Benjamin explained, that
the articles alluded to were merely
OYste s.