Thursday, April 26, 1934
a BY ALAN BROWNING JR.— »
THINGS WE CAN DO WITHOUT
People who talk in your face—and spray liberally with each
word . . . Fish and oysters . . . Those seeking some tidbit of pub
licity who say: "I've jotted down the facts. You write it be
cause you can do it so much better" . . . Rudy Vallee . . . Polks
who get sore because their news puff didn't make the front page
... Rowdies who stomp and whistle at picture shows ... Accounts
of operations . . .
Magazine salesmen . . . Fuller
brush salesmen . . . Shirt and socks
salesmen . . . People who want per
sonal correspondence from relatives
living in distant cities published in
the paper . . . Amateur poets . . .
Gushy women . . . Profuse profanity
. . . Long speeches . . . Huey Long
.. . Pessimists . .
COMMISSION
I've heard from a highly reliable
source that Charlie Wolfe worked as
a member of the Jonesville fire de
partment for many years without a
cent of pay. And that he resigned a
year or so ago at the height of the
Elkin fire epidemic because it was
reported to him that the members
of the Elkin fire department were
working on commission.
But that can't be so. Think of
the number of retired firemen we
would have around here now.
* * *
"MORNIN", HAROLD"
It comes to this department
straight that a local dime store mag
nate, while taking an early morning
~ p|
Visit our Spring Showing and see the
new conveniences, the new beauty,
of the Frigidaire '34.
You'll see Frigidaires that have
automatic defrosting; that have auto
matic ice tray release; that are of
gleaming, Lifetime Porcelain inside
and out. Frigidaires with double
capacity Hydrators; unusually large
food space, and extra room for tall
bottles. Frigidaires with wonder
fully convenient new features, such
as a Sliding Utility Basket for eggs
and other small articles, and the new
Frigidaire Servashelf.
In addition to the savings it brings,
the Frigidaire '34 operates on an
amazingly small amount of current.
Come in and see why women are
boasting, "Ours is a Frigidaire '34."
k PRODUCT OF GENERAL MOTORS
EVERT TEAR THE BEST OF THE YEAR
I
Plut Prtigkt
DELIVERED smi INSTALLED
HARRIS-BURGISS
ELECTRIC CO.
Elkin, N. C.
stroll about the streets of Washing
ton, D. C., when there on a visit re
cently, was astounded when a man
on a street corner greeted him "with
"Mornin', Harold." So astounded
was he that he went back to his ho
tel and informed his companiens
(also from Elkin), what had hap
pened. He swore he didn't know
the stranger and that his name was
not Harold, anyway.
However, an investigation dis
closed the stranger was merely en
gaged in his occupation of selling the
Morning Herald.
AT RANDOM
My wife seldom if ever reads the
Gab Bag. Living with it is bad
enough, she thinks . . , And living
it down is bad enough, I think . . .
Baker, up to the Chevrolet company
told me last week that if the men
who stole the Ford car out of their
garage a couple of weeks ago are
ever arrested they are going to be
charged with insanity—what with
all the new Chevies sitting around.
I haven't seen Ab Somers yet, but
it may be the thieves didn't take a
Chevy because they feared it might
be stiff in the knee-action . . . My
life's ambition is to make a trip to
the moon—or Mars. Striving for
higher things, as it were . . . Don't
believe everything you hear —even if
it's true ... I was 29 years old yes
terday—just an embittered old man
. . . The Merchants association is
planning to open the swimming pool
down in the bottom . . . Pneumonia
is measles' closest ally . . . Would
that dreams could come true . . .
A WIFE'S TESTIMONIAL
Boastum Co.,
Cattle Creek, Mich.
Gentlemen:
I am writing to tell you that up
until three days ago my husband was
one of the most irritable men I have
ever seen. He stayed in a bad hu
mor all the time, and often hurt his
family with his temper flare-ups. He
was the worst temper flare-upper
I've ever seen. But .no more!
You see, I noticed your ad. in the
funner paper about coffee nerves,
and how they changed a man from
an even tempered soul to an evil
tempered soul. Forthwith I decided
to try Boastum.
My husband doesn't flare up any
more. He died three days ago from
cancer of the brain. He didn't have
coffee nerves after all.
Moral: He might have had
though.
(I know it's silly, but what do you
expect for a dollar and a half a
year?)
THIS AND THAT
It's taken me exactly three and
one-half hours to get this far on
this week's column. Three and one
half hours wasted!
They say that one reason the Elk
in chapter of Henpecked Husbands
of America is not doing so well is due
to the fact that the alibi committee
is not functioning propertly.
But no wonder! Wives of the
members won't let their husbands
out nights enough to require any ali
bis.
I understand Earl James' name is
up for membership.
You can tell to what extent a man
is henpecked by how expertly he
folds a diaper.
Jonesville News
Mr. and Mrs. Lester Benge, of
ReTia, were the week-end guests of
Mr. and Mrs. G. M. Martin at their
home in Jonesville.
Mr. and Mrs. Ruffin Haynes and
children, of Jonesville, were the Sun
day guests of their daughter, Mrs.
Fred Winters, and Mr. Winters, of
Center.
Mr. and Mrs. Tom Pittman, of Ar
lington, had as their guests Sunday
Mrs. Pittman's brother, Mr. Prank
Roberson, and Mrs. Roberson and
small son and daughter. Garland and
Betty Jean, of Jonesville.
Mr- and Mrs. Mook, of
Jonesville, had as their guests Sun
day Mr. Hugh Benge and Miss Bessie
Benge, oil Rena.
Friends of Mrs. Gene Haynes, of
Jonesville, will be glad to learn that
THE ELKIN TRIBUNE, ELK IN. NORTH CAROLINA
she has recovered from her recent
illness.
Miss Teshie Rose, of Lexington,
was the week-end guest of her par
ents, Mr. and Mrs. Sandy Rose, of
Jonesville.
Mr. and Mrs. Joe Groce and child
ren of Jonesville, spent Sunday the
guests of Mr. and Mrs. Pat Groce
of Cycle.
Mrs. Bill Martin and Mrs. Lee
Spann, of Jonesville, were the guests
Tuesday of Mrs. Spann's parents,
Mr. and Mrs. R. W. Roberson, of
Winston-Salem. They were accom
panied by Mr. Martin and Mr. Spann
who motored to High Point on busi
ness.
Mr. and Mrs. J. C. Spann, of
Jonesville, had as their guests Sun
day their daughter, Mrs. Richard
Pruitte and Mr. Pruitte and child
ren, Doris, Barbara and Mildred, of
State Road, and Mr. Spann's sister,
Mrs. Sallie Benge. of Rena.
Mr. and Mrs. Lee Spann, of Jones
ville, had as their guests fir the
week-end, Mrs. Spann's parents, Mr.
and Mrs. R. W. Roberson. Mrs. Cur
tis Hussey, Masters Thurman and
Pete Roberson and little Miss Betty
Lou Roberson, of Winston-Salem.
Mr. and Mrs. Carl Rose, of Arling
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ton, were the guests Sunday of Mr.
Rose's parents, Mr. and Mrs. Sandy
Rose, of Jonesville.
Miss Dorothy Haynes, of Jones
ville, was the guest Sunday of Miss
Gladys Spann, of Arlington.
Messrs. Grady Coojce and Paul
Flynn, of Hamptonville, spent Sun
day in Jonesville visiting relatives
and friends.
Well advertised products are al
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jBW- FINE
REPAIRING
fiwj ® Two Expert
KjjSj] Repairmen
"Spy In Charge
C. W. STEELE
Jeweler
E. Main St. Elkin, X. C.
NOTICE !
Pay your electric light bill before the 10th of each
month. 5 percent will be added after the 10th.
SOUTHERN PUBLIC UTILITIES CO.
Honrs: Open 8:80 A. ML, Close 5:00 7. M.
PHONE 210
GREAT HEART
CO A L
Less than a bushel of ashes to the ton
CAROLINA ICE & FUEL COMPANY
Phone 83